lounge chatter

Better than the feeling you get when you dig a spoon into pristine Jello

2007-08-19T15:15:00.001-04:00

I always knew there would come a day when it would all just stop. An almost undetectable click of realization. It was as if a storm was raging one moment and a sea of calm appeared the next, like a divine hand passing over my twisting, writhing black-hearted soul telling me to just be still.

That day was yesterday.

How strange that it sneaks up on you just like that. I almost don't know what to do with myself and all this free headspace. My burden isn't simply unloaded onto some poor companion, it's gone.

Fettered no longer, footloose and fancy free am I!

All in time for a huge year. Can't hardly wait.

"Alright, blood me up"

2007-08-17T14:58:00.000-04:00

On Wednesday I got to participate in an emergency training exercise with SERT, CCPS, London EMS and London police, as well as the Tactical Squad, which is probably the London equivalent to the SWAT team.

The scenario was a mass shooting in a residence building, with SERT members as both casualties and responders.

I won't go into too much detail here as I feel like it has to be said in person to do it justice, really, but click on the link if you want to see me as a gunshot victim being carried out of the building.

This is the kind of thing I signed on for...it was a pretty cool thing to be a part of and observe. :D

"First rule of the weekend: don't get lost in the woods. Second rule: no pictures."

2007-08-10T09:25:00.000-04:00

Oh dear. Writing for the masses after such a long neglect, where do I begin? Details of my life can be acquired by the usual, most direct method: calling me up, so let's say you go right ahead and do that, and we can get some overpriced coffee and loiter in someone else's air-conditioned facilities if you want to prattle back and forth for hours, or quadruple shots of tequila if you want the run-down fast and dirty with possibly a few obscenities thrown in. We can subsequently do something utterly distasteful to celebrate our black-hearted moments.

In short, however, life is pretty much as fan-fucking-tastic as it gets. The prospects of the upcoming year are overwhelming as usual, but in the most exciting, deliciously busy way possible. In the past four months I have come to more fully appreciate the friends that I have, the family that loves me, and learned about the stubborn things in life that just never seem to die, no matter how hard you try to smother, stomp on, or tear them into little pieces and let them blow away into the wind. I haven't decided whether or not I like that last thing or if I thumb my nose at it, but if it's going to keep hanging around like that stupid Umbrella song, then I will tolerate it at the very least, until I get used to the idea.

In long, I'd rather not announce on the internets, as I am developing an aversion to creepable means of communication. I try to no longer post on Facebook any pictures that show where I've been or what I've done, write details of my life on people's walls beyond superficial chatter...I'm no criminal, but let's just say I'm not altogether too keen on the idea of little birds knowing exactly what I've been up to. Let's keep up the illusion of mystery here, shall we?

You will still find shameless promotion of Sophie's photographs as we make more of them, so stay tuned.

I am reachable and meetable by the usual ways, but only for a little while longer before I am back at school. Reach me.

And, while you're here, and if you're familiar with the SuicideGirls...you might be interested in this lawsuit they are filing against one of their photographers, Philip Warner, also known as Lithium Picnic. You might not want to click that link if you're reading this at work.

Click.

2007-07-04T02:08:00.000-04:00

Ever wonder what someone looks like when they're sitting on top of a green bin smirking?

Well, now you can find out! (Photos!)

Kidding. Thanks to Sophie for a fantastic afternoon. :)

The pursuit of romanticism

2007-07-03T10:08:00.000-04:00

He took a closer look at my belly ring, yeah
Asked me if I would be his latest fling

Fireworks on the beach, drinks until closing, staying out too late, dressing up and pretending to be someone else for an afternoon--

I might as well be drowning in it; the beauty fills my lungs and both overwhelms and exhilarates at the same time.

Whew.

48 hours of great news

2007-06-29T22:54:00.000-04:00

1. The Spice Girls are having a reunion tour. Geri Halliwell, you'd better dig out that Uinon Jack dress. Who wants to go see them?!

2. New! Dress!

3. Emceeing a sweeeet grad party. Those Latin Americans know how to par-tay.

4. Finding out that Sophie has another! photo shoot planned

5. Scoring a 35 on my mock MCAT.

6. Finding out that the band playing at O-Week is NOT Sam Roberts.

7. Realizing that Nobody Cares If I Don't Show Up for Volunteering

8. The Paris Hilton interview on Larry King. It's hilarious how seriously she takes herself, because nobody else seems to.

9. There is no nine.

Lucid Dreaming

2007-06-20T08:30:00.000-04:00

I just had a dream where I was getting a blood transfusion (in a CLASSROOM, no less), in which I noticed that the bag was no longer emptying becuase it wasn't at the right height (it was just sitting on the desk). Being the genius that I am, I told the person sitting next to me to hang it up for me. Unfortunately, the bag had no regulator attached to it and I got a massive nosebleed from the sudden increase in pressure. I then went to the bathroom to get my shit together, and discovered more bags hanging in nicely organized racks by the stalls. I distinctly remember picking one up, reading the label (some elementary school had a mass donation, and that's what I read off the sticker) and saying "Sweeeeet! The blood of children!"

So THAT'S why there's an age limit on blood donation.

The previous night, I had a dream where Ivan appeared. We were going somewhere, and he was wearing all denim, shorter, and about 50 pounds heavier. I wish I remembered where we were going, although I don't think that would've excused the all denim.

Why don't you go right on ahead and...

2007-06-19T08:42:00.000-04:00

I've discovered a trash talkin', ball-bustin', boy-lustin' lay-deh that comes out whenever I'm in an extremely poor headspace. I suspect she'd come out too if I were heavily inebriated or on some other illicit substance. She's made a few star appearances recently, which really took me by surprise as I usually have the sense to back away from situations early enough to blow off steam elsewhere.

Time with her blows my mind--she leaves me tired and spent, sometimes quivering from the exertion; she is a force unto herself. All that spent-ing and quivering reminds me an awful lot of something else, but this is not the place for discussion about that.

I've named her Lydia, hide your children! If she were a real person, she'd probably be a superfox with fire engine red hair and a penchant for short skirts and really high heels. And I bet she could cuss out your mother and your dog in the same sentence.

If naming an alter ego isn't a sign of someone who's Seriously Messed Up, I don't know what is. At least she hasn't done gone and pwned someone yet, like Nikki/Jessica on Heroes.

The only thing missing was Jay Manuel

2007-06-13T14:22:00.000-04:00

Liberated and having watched altogether too much ANTM for one lifetime, Sophie, Krista and I headed to Ashbridges Bay to test out her new SB800.

Results are here. Alas, the light faded rather quickly and Ms. Zhang hadn't quite worked out how to use her new toy yet, but not to worry - now we simply have an excuse to do it again.

Photos and camera jockeying by Sophie. Makeup by ourselves.

On beating something to death

2007-05-21T21:43:00.001-04:00

Hello internets, it's me again.

What a funny feeling to be torn in two directions all at once--to go through days at a time feeling outrageously happy, but to simultaneously have that twisty feeling in your gut that makes you anxious and fearful of what lies ahead.

Sometimes the hardest thing to do is to recall what it was like back in the day, and to hang on to that as you push ahead, trying to forge something bigger and more beautiful, all the while trying not to mourn what inexplicably feels like the loss of something precious, like sand slipping through your fingers.

At least I know I'm not the only one to have felt this way before...

Well, that's the end of that.

This is as much as I can can afford to say, let alone feel. Sometimes the only real way of coping with tremendous emotion is a kind of forced indifference - that manufactured detachment from an issue so that it can't interfere with other, more crucial spheres of your life.

Work, extracurriculars and friends (work especially) are sufficient such that one can drown in them - that's what I'll do, and it starts now.

If only I could stop tossing and turning at night.

"And there's no blame, for how our love did slowly fade.
Now that it's gone, it's like it wasn't there at all.
Here I rest, where disappointment and regret, collide.
Lying awake at night."

They loves me, and Germans too

2007-05-17T17:22:00.000-04:00

This is what my parents got me for my birthday. The card explained that the gift is a symbol of my having reached adulthood.

There is nothing quite like your parents braving May hail to go buy you booze, just in time for May 2-4.

I made the mistake (?) of trying to reply to every single facebook birthday message I got, not expecting anyone to respond to that, but they did, and I seem to have dug myself quite a hole in terms of having to respond to everyone...again.

Because geeks are hot

2007-05-07T00:37:00.000-04:00

You've probably seen this before, but if you haven't, and watching 3-d animations of leukocyte extravasation, kinesins walkin' around on microtubules, intermediate filament networks, and GPI-anchored proteins on lipid rafts tickle your fancy...you won't be disappointed.

He tells me it's like love in the movies, only real

2007-04-07T23:00:00.000-04:00

December 15th, 2005: There is a beautiful girl in my life who conjures within me that feeling that everyone calls 'love'. I don't think the word alone can suffice. It is the feeling of inexorable happiness that comes when you are infinitely happy and you know it's not going anywhere. It is the feeling that inexplicably pulls me from the depths of whatever rut I faced before, and inspires me to be all the things I am certain I can be.

I know you wrote it about me, yet I don't know if I fit that picture anymore. You hardly need me for inspiration anymore, darling--it seems you have found other things to occupy your time and mind more completely, while I have been put fifth on the list, behind sleeping until noon, Magic cards, Subway at 3am, and hanging out with your floor. Perhaps it's because you know I'm not going anywhere that you think I'll keep coming back, even when neglected. Or, you just have no clue.

January 17th, 2006: Love is what I'm in...

Is that still so, my love?

January 17th, 2006: I want to ask you for time, for patience...
...I know you'd give it to me. You already are. You are holding on to a life raft of hope, that I will one day find what you have. I WANT TO, do I ever, for you I would do anything. Die, even - who would have thought.

My darling, do you remember those words? So long ago...would you die for me now? I am running out of patience as time and time again your wordy promises don't match your actions. I want to be patient, I do. Does patience expire?

March 25th, 2006: My heart has never been happier. It is the product of all kinds of influences, both on the outside and within, that produce that warm feeling that there is so much beauty in the world. I think it is music, school, my friends, my family, a new and growing understanding and relationship with God, and that wonderful (aka. drop dead talented brilliant super incredible) girl in my life that are fostering in me a kind of anticipation for the rest of my life that is always growing.

Alas...it seems so long since we've grown

Call me melodramatic. You'd ask the same things if you were me.

Where are we going? Are we there yet?

Only inclined to post on holidays

2007-04-07T13:55:00.000-04:00

Hello, strangers--it's been a while. Our correpondence is so limited now that I am soooo far away in London, Ontario, but since they haven't yet invented any form of expedient, convenient communication, and sending pigeon or horseback messengers is such a hassle (and costly!) I totally understand.

No, I haven't been too busy...just rather unconcerned, I suppose, with maintaining this bad boy right here.

In the past two months, I have:

Gone to the Dominican Republic to volunteer at an orphanage (it was amazing, ask me about it)
Helped prepare next year's soph team (it's also amazing, and incredibly good looking)
Become a part of the Delaware Hall Residents' Council for next year
Become a certified first aid instructor
Registered for an MCAT
Gone home once
Wished that some things would change already, damn it
Wrestled with the future
Fought for what I believe I deserve, and failed, repeatedly, only to do it again later
Taken second/third/fourth/fith place to Magic cards, Subway sandwiches, sleep, and friends
Put up with far, far, too much crap

My academic life is going splendidly, thank you. I am accomplishing things that I want to accomplish. I am surrounded by friends who love me, yet sometimes there is a pervading sense of dissatisfaction that I can't seem to shake.

It is quite one thing to say that you love and support someone, but quite another to feel that love and support as something tangible, more than empty words and broken promises. When the two don't seem to line up, something is awry. When one must beg and plead their supposed lover to spend time with them, something is not right. When it no longer feels like the other person is making an effort and seems to find you a nuisance when you take them away from things that should not be higher in priority than that person you say you "love", something must change.

It is one thing to want to care about someone and see them succeed, but quite a difficult thing to support someone who seems not to care much for it or their own success. How does you make someone see that what they're doing is hurting, not helping, both themselves and those they claim to care about, when they look at the same situation and find absolutely nothing wrong with it?

On the other hand, should I care? I do, right now--his problems are my problems, yet if I were to abandon hope and jump ship this very second...five years from now, will I still be burdened with the outcome of the situation, whether it be positive or negative? Will it affect my personal life, my goals, my future? Probably not.

Alas, where the ship is headed I'm not sure. I wish I could say with certainty that this ship were like a beautiful yacht, a bright spot on the horizon, and I a distressed swimmer who has gone overboard, who, upon reaching that ship, finds herself tired but happy, and feeling like that swim was worth the effort. Right now, exchange that glistening yacht for a fishing boat with no destination--you swim up to it, drained and unhappy that you just spent all this energy swimming towards a heap of metal that smells like rotting fish and requires you to wear yellow rubber overalls, when you could've waited for a yacht to come by, or just drowned instead. Sure, there is nothing inherently wrong with being on a fishing boat or smelling like fish...but it sure is no yacht. I am but one person, and one person does not a yacht make with her own two hands...I don't think they could do that if there were a show called Pimp My Boat Single Handedly.

Or something like that.

But onto happier subject matter: Summer is almost here, which means I am going camera shopping for a new baby, and then going on long expeditions to play with said baby.

I'll be in Toronto starting the 28th, so please, pleeeease let's hang out--it's been too long.

Summer will bring The Barbecue (!!!), or maybe A Second Barbecue Also (!!!!!), provided there is enough interest.

Cool.

Janjuberry

2007-01-29T19:16:00.000-05:00

What do you mean it's the end of January?

Well, that sure creeped up on me. This past month I have done many things, most of which had very little to do with school.

I'm now a certified Standard First Aid Instructor. It took three weekends!

I've noticed that I've become even less inclined than I was last year to go out to loud Western-boy Western-girl saturated clubs and bars (unless it is The Brass Door on Thursdays, which is not your typical university bar...one of those Thursdays when I have no work to do...which is not the usual case), and more inclined to sit and have pitcher after pitcher with a bunch of people at The Spoke. No lining up in the cold, no dressing up required, endlessly entertaining, especially when Mr. Low Tolerance himself is with me.

Kev and I both applied for the position of Head Soph next year, and Kev got it. I'm now torn between becoming res staff and coming back to soph next year.

My cell bio prof is incredibly unpleasant. Every second spent with him is made painfully clear that we feeble undergrads are simply diverting precious time he'd rather be spending researching his organism of specialization: blood flukes.

First lecture: "I'm a last-minute stand-in for this course...don't send me any emails...Logan [our TA] can probably teach this course better than I can, so send him emails if you have any questions. I'm just going to reuse all of [last year's prof] slides..."

Next lecture: "Now...I don't know why [last year's prof] put this slide here...or what he means by this note, but I'm going to assume he means this...okay, I also don't like the order he has them in, so I'm going to skip to this slide here [that nobody has, because it's from another set of notes] first..." *mad rustling*

Today, a guy in a gorilla suit walked into class while he was lecturing, hovered around for a few seconds and then walked out. When the class exploded into giggles, he went "What? What's so funny about this slide?" More hilarity ensued.

I don't want to say that he's sort of slow...and a big jerk...so I won't. You can bet I'm thinking it though.

In the next two weeks, I have four midterms, and after the break...another four midterms (or is it five?) HOORAY!

After midterms...final exams!

Le sigh.

Oh, Merry Boxing Day!

2006-12-25T23:56:00.000-05:00

Returning from a long bout of internet-silence, I almost feel like I have nothing to say.

From the first month or so of school, which was action-packed and full of not sleeping, to the fourth month of school, which was just full of not sleeping, the in-between has mostly just been school and rowing and SERT and generally being less organized than I'd like. Don't get me wrong--everything is going well, I love my floor (among others), I enjoy my classes, and I'm surrounded by wonderful people pretty much 24/7 (hooray, res!), but man, I got nothin' for this post. You need to just ask me in person. Well, there's this one (actually, there are many) about this sketchy dude who showed up on my floor one day and never seems to leave...he looks like Bono, goes by the name "42" and frequently asks me if he should drink tonight, even though his "liver hurts". I tell him "no", but he never listens. Ask me about him when you see me.

It's funny. I feel that when I don't have a schedule that forces me to go full steam sixteen hours a day and work at every available moment and take advantage of every second of rest, I feel unproductive and generally crappy. The hard part is following that schedule when you don't have a coach or a team kicking your ass and heckling you when you don't show up to practice.

First semester of second year handed me a bunch of half-courses that, to my dismay, left no room for a learning curve in the courses where I needed it. Upon saying this, I should remind you that I know I'm one of those people--one of the ones you tell to shut up when they complain about their exam marks. Still.

Home is excellent so far, though it seems every day there has been something going on that prevents me from being too deliciously lazy. Last-minute shopping (not a whole lot...), family dinners and the like. Drove out to Mississauga today to see Kev, which is something I think I should've done during the summer too because it only takes 25 minutes...whereas it took him three hours to get here by public transit. (Kev, this is why you need to get your license!) On the other hand, there is nothing to do in Missisauga other than Square One and Playdium so...

Anyhoo, Kev and I went to a Korean restaurant for lunch, waved at his parents who drove past us along the way, visited the Japanese garden near his house (it was nice, but cold, there were ducks, and we left quickly), looked at baby pictures (my verdict is that he looked more mixed (and more adorable) as a little kid), looked at pictures from That Awkward Phase That Everyone Seems To Go Through (and made fun of them both out loud and in my mind...hee), fell asleep for half an hour, and in general didn't have enough time together. *gush gush gush gush* Okay, done.

I leave for St. Louis by bus tomorrow night on an 18 (19?) hour ride for the Urbana missions conference, which should be an eye-opening experience. I don't feel quite prepared mentally for this, but I'm going to try to absorb like a sponge for four days. I'll be back on the 1st in the P-M.

Before I leave, I plan to brave the mall with my mom, but only because my mom wants to brave the mall and fight for a leather jacket. Boxing day and cheap gas nights are how I know I am my father's daughter. We hate people, and we'd rather pay full price than be surrounded by them, or have to stand in a lineup for ages, or not find anything in our size (medium, also known as "the size that everyone who shows up at the mall the second it opens wears". This, of course, is not applicable to gas). Unfortunately, I too like cheap stuff, so I'll ask friends who work in retail to buy clothes for me on Boxing Day so I can pay them back later. (Thanks Robyn!)

Between now and when I get back, it'd best snow like a mofo here, because DAMNIT I want to go snowboarding next week. Oh, and someone (other than me) organize a get-together so that the lazy group of friends we all belong to can go to it. I bet it'll end up being at my house. Don't volunteer me while I'm gone. Harrumpf.

See you in 2007!

Eric posts more often than I do

2006-11-27T12:46:00.000-05:00

I am suitably ashamed.

How's about the basics and then a few up-and-comings?

I'm fine, alive, and gearing up for finals.

Winter training for rowing is going on right now...I haven't done a practice yet.

SERT is great, always.

Urbana this winter break!

Dominican Republic this reading week to volunteer with Orphanage Outreach!

Already planning for the summer:

Lab job scholarship applications...on top of the lab work application itself.

I might be going to Australia for a 1-semester exchange next fall.

MCAT the coming summer.

Busy, busy.

Errrm. That's it, sorry. School eats my life. See you all soon!

Updates are like parfaits, everybody loves them

2006-10-03T17:49:00.000-04:00

I'm so tired. But I'm so productive.

Novice men and women won gold at Head of the Trent this past Saturday, which was sweet. We got the call partway through our 4-hour drive back to London from Peterborough. This past weekend was Trent's homecoming, and since they don't have football, rowing is their big thing. Teams from McGill, Rochester, clubs and universities all over Ontario were there. Trent's campus is really pretty, but also really small. The finish line of the race ran under a bridge and people were jumping off it--a 40 foot drop, and piss drunk. Good combination. It was a really cold and dreary day, and we waited almost 8 hours before we actually raced.

Sunday was Big Sit Sunday for the Student Emergency Response Team, and you'll all be glad to know I made the team! My floor considers it as incentive to drink more when I'm on call. As Webnesh pointed out, you can now take your "let's be reckless around Tiff because she can save us" to greater extremes because I'm more qualified now. I even know how to deliver a baby.

This morning for rowing practice we couldn't go out on the lake because it was lightning-ing, so one of my coaches decided it'd be fun to do a 40-minute rowing relay on the ergs (rowing machines) in teams of three, going 2 minutes on (all out), 4 minutes off. This resulted in me puking up the three mouthfuls of water I had in my stomach by the end of the relay, but at least I held it in until the end. By the time the 7am crew came for their practice, the lightning had stopped and they never got to experience the joy of feeling like you're going to die while strapped by your feet to a machine.

I'm also down with the plague, and the lack of sleep due to being up late for training and trying to keep up with homework, plus early morning practices for rowing are not helping matters at all. I'm still hardcore though. Bitches.

Western is awesome as usual, though the weather is getting crappy. My floor is great, and life is so deliciously good and busy and action-ful I should probably stop talking about it lest one of you punch me in the face next time you see me for loving it so much.

Fini!

Sorry, more blurbing.

2006-09-16T16:49:00.000-04:00

First of all, I want everyone to know that instead of a) cleaning my room, the contents of which looks like a bag of laundry and textbooks exploded in there, b) doing the week's worth of memorizing amino acids that I must do for biochem, and c) buying the books and manuals I still need, I am updating you lovelies on my life, which indicates a) I love you all dearly, b) I think people like knowing what I'm up to as much as I like knowing what people are up to, and c) I'm really just procrastinating and this is a poor attempt at covering it up.

In any case. In the past two weeks, I have...

Gone through O-Week!! - There is nothing like being a soph during O-week. For a week straight we ran on an average of 3-4 hours of sleep a night, we were up early (6am sometimes) for meetings, up late (2 or 3am) doing walk-homes and cleaning up late night programming events, we screamed ourselves hoarse with literally hours (collectively) of cheering, and it was amazing. One of the frosh asked me why we went to such great lengths to be there for them, without any sort of monetary reward, and I had to tell them that we did it for the frosh, and that when we pour our heart and soul into O-Week, O-Week gives back to us. I remember being elated when the froshies started leading cheers on their own, or when they expressed their thanks for our efforts. Somehow, it made the sleep deprivation and having to wear the same uniform every day for a week worthwhile. Plus, we got to do frosh week all over again. Double awesome.

Highlights: marching to Opening Ceremonies, wax-a-soph (which raised $465 for Terry Fox and Shinerama), Top Sci dance, foam party OUTDOORS, Engineers parachuting onto UC Hill during the big outdoor BBQ for charity awareness, taping my frosh to a telephone pole for Shinerama day!

Skittles and Hungry, charity reps extraordinaire. We're good at what we do.

Science sophs, whose theme was Top Sci (after Top Gun). "Who's our wingman?" "Sloot, Sloot" "What's his name?" "Sanchez!" (that would be the blowup doll, Sanchez the Sloot)

Firebreathing rally against Saugeen (white shirts) and MedSyd (black shirts)

Made it on to the novice rowing team - OH BABY. Novice season ends at the end of October, but we have a regatta every single weekend starting next weekend until the end of the season (and minus Thanksgiving). It's going to be an intense two months, and then there's winter training, if we want to row varsity next year. Which I do. Woot woot.

Gone through tryouts for the Student Emergency Response Team - I'll let you know how that goes.

Attended Soph Formal - not much to explain here, but it was an awesome night. All 800 sophs were invited for a night of dancing, inebriation optional, and it was super cool to see sophs from all the other teams all dressed up. And, of course, we finally learned each other's real names, after having called each other by soph names all week.

Hot Deli sophs.

Cue "awwwwww". Haha. Kev is wearing sunglasses to hide his Asian glow. ololol. I'm pretending I have cleavage.

Want more photos? Facebook's got them. Check out the Eng "carbecue", foam party, face painting, wax-a-soph pictures, carnival and midway, Sam Roberts...yeah.

In which I blurb about many things.

2006-09-09T00:36:00.000-04:00

Note: I wrote this a long-ass time ago, but Blogger was being stupid, and then O-Week came. Stay tuned for a post O-week update.

----------------------------

In the past few weeks, I have...

Hosted a barbecue for me and my homies, which included seeing people I hadn't seen in over a year, watching Kev be both drunk and hungover sort of at the same time, tallboy beer can chicken (up the bum!), three cakes, and tasty-brand burgers.

Played in a charity golf tournament for Shinerama and Terry Fox. We got to play with GPS golf carts that displayed every hole, and told us how far away we were from the pin, as well as had a leaderboard that told us by how much we were winning (or losing...mostly losing) in comparison with the other teams. We also won the award for Best Costume for our "We got game...just the wrong one" theme. Justine was an (angry) soccer player, I was volleyball'd out, Markymark was a tennis champ, and Diana was a baaaaller. Justine and I picked up 5-class passes to Moksha Yoga (in a 37 degree heated room!), Markymark picked up a 3-month free movie pass to Western Film, and Diana got a vase from Ten Thousand Villages, the local fair trade store. So many prizes to choose from--gift certificates to restaurants, bars, spas...crazy.

We scored like, 96 or something. And we were playing scrambles. And it took 5 hours for us to finish. Best team scored 11 under.

On the way to and from Forest City National, we blasted old school N'Sync.

Nooo, forgot to wear my kneepads for the shot!

Changed my haircolour. Working in a pool 8 hours a day does not bode well for your hair colour. Angie hooked me up with new and better hair! Random day though, because it was move-in day for me but there are oh, maybe 20 people in the entire building and the idea of "well, we have nothing better to do" has pretty much dictated our decisions. Friday went something like this:

1:30 - pick up Angie at her house in Toronto
4:30ish - arrive in London, attempt to drop Angie off at her house, which fails due to lack of key, and landlord's lack of copy of key (bad landlords)
after that - Return to Delaware, move Tiff's stuff into room, thankful for elevators and wheely carts. Go back to Angie's because subletter is home and can open the door, after which we bum around. Walk to mall to get key copied, only to discover key copying place is closed. Eat butter chicken in mall, buy popsicles. Begin walking home. Suddenly decide to dye hair (because we had nothing else to do), walk back to mall, buy hair dye, walk back to Angie's to drop off melting popsicles, walk to neighbour's house, play with guinea pig, walk back to Delaware. Dye hair. Play Mastermind. Attempt to play Chinese Chess. Give up. Have slumber party in empty double room down the hall.

Did I mention that we took pictures in the bathroom?

Attended a Throwback Soph Pub. New and old sophs wearing their oldest soph uniforms partying at The Wave. Yay being 19!

...Attended Charity Rep training, charity rep "TRAINING" (er, party), I'm currently attending Soph training (Bling Bling, Soph Rally/Pub, etc.) and then, on to O-Week!

Charity Night

2006-08-12T19:20:00.000-04:00

Once upon a time, I had a dream, inspired by my newfound drive as a Charity Rep, and I sent out a proposal. One club answered.

3000 Facebook invites, 500 emails, and a month and a half later, she called me at 7:25, told me she was still at Warden Station.

"Dammit, Web, way to be late as usual."

We went to Hooters for dinner, and Strahan had an 11-dollar burger, and I a 7-dollar BLT. It's okay, we paid for the scenery, even though we pretty much inhaled and ran back outside to meet up with the others.

We milled around until everyone was there, and I stepped over two people crowding the doorway to ring the doorbell. Twice. The chime was electronic and I peered through the crack in the door, when a gruff beast of a man opened the door and hit me with it.

"What?"
"WOAH--Hello. Is George there?"
"One sec." *closes the door, walks off into the club* "GEORGE!!!"

We were led upstairs. The setting was perfect. Loungey and spacious, the bar was backlit violet. I love violet.

Setup, meeting, banners smoothed and stickers stuck and shirts altered.

And then we waited, anticipatingly.

And waited.

Some friends showed up, but not enough.

"The guestlist had 100 people. It's already eleven o'clock."
"Be patient."
"When can I stop being patient?"
"When you feel like giving up."
"Oh."
"How many are we at?"
"Twenty-three."
Shit.

Midnight rolled around, and we packed up to leave, with the club owner offering his sincerest apologies and best wishes, and me doing likewise for all his trouble.

So much for a big party. Stupid RSVP'd wankers.

Well, maybe they all got hit by a bus. All of them. At the same time. Yeah, that's it.

Or they're just big unreliable wankers.

My friends reassured me I'd done a great job with the organizing, but I was just sorry they made the effort to come out and didn't get to enjoy themselves as much as they should have.

They dragged me out to Piccadilly Circus afterwards for drinks and dancing, only I didn't drink because I had to cart everything and everyone back home afterwards.

"Sweetie, you've got something on your face," he slurred, pointing out my Shinerama temporary tattoo and putting his hand on my waist.
I squirmed.
"Oh, it's a tattoo."
"No it isn't...no it isn't, you wouldn't do that."
"It's a fake one."
"Oh, then you should've said that."
"Sorry, next time."
"Okay. You're pretty."
"Thanks."

Aside from the sketchballs watching the girls ("Hey! This is the closest we can come to dancing like a stripper, but it's okay because at least we're not really taking our clothes off!") work the poles and each other up on the podium, and random walk-by touching and grabbing, it was a great way to end off the night with all the friendsies.

I didn't bother to unload my car after I got home at 4 am.

Sigh.

Wewt!

2006-07-28T23:52:00.000-04:00

I wrote my final exam today (3 hours and not nearly enough time for me to write stellar essays...I had to settle for one good and one rather shoddy one)...what better way to celebrate the end of summer school by drinking? Alone?

That's right, I thought so.

So that is what I am doing--sitting in my own filth of books and papers scattered about, sipping peach schnapps and ginger ale. I'm pretty comfortable in my own filth, as evidenced by the month-long, 2-foot deep mess that is the floor of my room. I don't even remember what colour my carpet is. Apparently now I have no excuse not to clean it.

And finally I now have no excuse to not go to the Y every single day until I move in to Delaware--which happens to be the very next day after work officially ends. No rest for the wicked, I know. *sigh*

In other news, I still love my job, partly because it seems almost like second nature to me to teach swimming, and mostly because my coworkers and I spend our breaks doing things like Operation Turn The Tot Dock Into a Boat (by strapping lifejackets to all the legs and putting pool noodles under it) and Operation Wear As Many Lifejackets As Possible Before Jumping In The Pool Off The Guard Chair (done right, you can get multiple layers and not even have your upper body touch the water). We considered taking photos, but I think we decided to learn from the mistakes of the staff at the Olympium, who filmed themselves riding off the diving tower on a bike, only to post it on the internet and have their supervisor 'discover' it (although that doesn't mean we don't plan to ride a bike into the pool ourselves).

We DID, however, take pictures of us each making out/waltzing with our brand-spanking new CPR dummy that is about 1000 times better than the Actars the City usually buys for training--for one, JimTwo (I named our old Actar "Jim") has a complete upper torso made of foam, his head isn't flat on the back and actually falls back down the way it SHOULD on a real unconscious person, when you blow into his mouth the chest actually inflates, and the piston in his chest CLICKS when you've compressed properly. Needless to say, we are smitten, and hankering for the next step up, which would be our very own Little Timmy, which looks and feels and even weighs like a real child, with ribs and bones and everything. Toss him in the deep end? He REALLY SINKS!

Despite the one or two kids here and there I want to toss into the deep end, I am making the monies doing something that's been beaten into me through years and years of training. I mean, if I had an office or retail job, I might actually have to, you know, work...instead of standing in the pool and telling kids to put their face in the water.

My kids are funny, I get very attached to them--or I laugh at them (at, not with):
- That one we left bawling in the middle of the SHALLOW end in a lifejacket on his back because he refused to a) listen b) let go of the instructors who were trying to help him do his floats c) understand that he could stand up and was really just a big wussy? Laff!
- The three-year-old who insisted on copying her brothers and sisters (jumping off the diving blocks, off the guard chair, going into the deep end), only to chicken out and start bawling every time I she actually got up on the blocks, or went into the deep end? Laff!
- The kid who walked by JimTwo, who was lying on the ground, and was utterly repulsed and asked us "why would you want him to look like that"? Laff!
- Colin, who sang a pirate song instead of telling us his name the first day, and frequently asks "Can we do something else now?", to which I frequently cut him off and respond "NO". Attach!
- The Two Jennys, who are in the same class together and are Superstars at listening to corrections and busting their tails? Attach!
- My super Ultra 1's who come the first day terrified of putting their face in, and spend the last day (9th day) of class throwing themselves off the diving blocks in the deep end? Attach! Especially if they're roly poly or just super cute.
- My little boys who psych themselves into thinking they can't swim all the way across the pool without touching the bottom, only to be forced to swim in the deep end, where I tell them to "swim to me" and move back as they come closer until I reach the opposite wall? Laff AND Attach! "I TOLD you you could do it" (One of the boys asked me on the LAST DAY what my name was. I told him to get out of the pool and never come back.)

Frequently, I fail kids--not because they haven't improved, but because they're simply not quite ready to progress. Frequently, parents come up to me to ask if it's "okay" that they've already registered their kid for the next level and it's too late to transfer back down. Frequently I tell them, "technically, yes", but I also mention that their kid will probably either "suck terribly and be totally left behind", "fail that level and/or get kicked back", or "drown in the deep end". Okay, not the last one. The parents are pretty much all nice people, my supervisor is really just Santa Claus considering how much equipment he's bought us this year, and my pool manager and coworkers are amazing.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, work is the bombdiggity. I am so lucky.

Charity Bash in two weeks!

I'd rather be plugging charity events in this really long post than finding common themes in Children's Lit books

2006-07-22T22:40:00.000-04:00

I don't know if I've mentioned this to you already, but I'm currently a charity rep for Shinerama for my residence's soph team. Western supports two charities during O-week: The Terry Fox Foundation and Shinerama. By now, you will have recieved a slew of emails from me regarding various charity events. Let me take this opportunity to inform you once more:

1. Charity Fundraiser Night at Afterlife, $3 drinks all night long
250 Adelaide St. West
Friday, August 11th, 2006, doors at 10pm, event ends 3am

This is my baby, I have toiled all summer to organize this. $10 cover, EVERY CENT of it going to Terry Fox and Shinerama. Please come out, mostly because T. Fox was an amazing man, and Shinerama is a fantastic organization, but also partly because if it turns out totally to be a lame event because everyone decides to go "aww, but it'll be all UWO people (not if you're not from UWO and you COME ANYWAY with your FRIENDS!)...aww, I don't know if my friends are going (invite them out!)", I'll probably have a nervous breakdown. No, no, I'll have fun without you and you can be lame sitting at home while I party it up for charity. Okay: even if you can't come, try to encourage other people to. It's on Facebook under "Events" if you search "Afterlife", and you're welcome to send out that email I sent you.

2. Terry Fox Run

I'll be participating in the Terry Fox Run at UWO this year--please consider supporting me. You can pledge online to me directly here. Yes, it is a secure site.

From Justine, the T-Fox rep on the Delaware Soph Team
I know that you are all familiar with the annual run but let's think about it for a second. This young man went out and DID IT. There is not a single person today that doesn't have a personal experience with cancer. We all know of someone that has battled with this disease. While many people recognized the serious impact that cancer has on society, it took a young man with an incredible heart to dedicate his LIFE to a cure.

Terry Fox lost his leg to cancer when he was 18 years old. My age. How sad you say. Yeah, sad I say. Fox didn't ASK to get sick. No one ASKS to get sick. Terry Fox -- athlete of the year at his high school and a dedicated basketball player, Terry had some difficult times ahead of him.

After battling through treatments and learning how to use a prosthetic, Terry was able to battle on and at 22 he started out on his Marathon of Hope with the goal of raising 1 million dollars for cancer. I have two legs and would collapse after 5 miles, but this kid trained his butt tri style and ran 3339 miles in 143 days. Through 6 provinces he ran... and he wasn't doing this for himself. See at this time, Terry Fox believed that he had won the battle with cancer.. but young and able and knowing the pain, suffering, loneliness, and discouragement that victims everywhere were facing, Fox went out on the marathon of hope for THEM. 3, 339 miles. Almost a marathon a day and a lot of it alone.

Terry Fox gave people hope.

"He makes you believe in the human race again."

Terry was in pain through a lot of his run but as he neared Thunder Bay the pain was no longer endurable and Fox finally asked his friend (he had a friend drive a van along as he ran) to take him to the hospital. There it was confirmed that the bone cancer had spread to Terry's lungs.

"The day before I'd run 26 miles and now I couldn't even walk across the street," he said.

"I don't feel this is unfair," Terry told him. "That's the thing about cancer. I'm not the only one. It happens all the time, to other people. I'm not special. This just intensifies what I did. It gives it more meaning. It'll inspire more people. I could have sat on my rear end, I could have forgotten what I'd seen in the hospital, but I didn't."

"How many people do something they really believe in? I just wish people would realize that anything's possible, if you try; dreams are made, if people try. When I started this run, I said that if we all gave one dollar, we'd have $22 million for cancer research, and I don't care man, there's no reason that isn't possible. No reason. I'd like to see everybody go kind of wild, inspired with the fund-raising."

Isadore Sharp had sent a telegram which Terry pinned to his hospital bed. He said that Terry's marathon was just the beginning and that a fundraising run would be held in his name every year to continue his fight against cancer.

"You started it. We will not rest until your dream to find a cure for cancer is realized."

February 1, 1981 – Terry's hope of raising $1 from every Canadian to fight cancer is realized. The national population reaches 24.1 million; the Terry Fox Marathon of Hope fund totals $24.17 million

Terry died, his family beside him, June 28, 1981 – one month short of his twenty-third birthday.

Each year in cities all over the world Terry Fox Runs raise money for Cancer research. The National Cancer Institute of Canada is able to put 87 cents of every dollar directly toward research.

At Charity weekend we talked about whether a few students can make a difference. So you raise your 20 bucks. so what. In addition to the $17.40 that just went directly to cancer research, you are an inspiration to cancer patients, survivors, and their families everywhere. One of the speakers told us about how his parents watch the UWO run on television each year and that it is these young people -- you and I -- that give them the hope and courage that they need to battle through their next treatments.

"I'm not a dreamer, and I'm not saying this will initiate any kind of definitive answer or cure to cancer, but I believe in miracles. I have to." TF

3. Charity Beer Bottle Drive...

...Is still ongoing! Save empties! Bring them to my house on BBQ day! Beer saves lives!

Which brings me to...

4. Tiff's Annual BBQ Extravaganza

Ever since I took up event planning I have begun to use the word "extravaganza" an awful lot. Tiffany is a very busy girl with work, which eats her weekdays, and various things taking up her weekends, but she loves you to bits so even though I am drowning in scheduling and event planning, I'm making time to continue the tradition. This year, the B-B-Q is going to be on Sunday August 20th, rain or shine! If rain...well, one of you is going to be holding an umbrella for me while I barbecue. Pray for good weather, but if it's crappy out we'll still have a fun time hanging out indoors and playing chinese chess.

Food bringing as usual, drink bringing is fine. Email me for details if you need them. Same place as usual, start time TBA, most likely between 1-2pm.

Why is this under charity events, you ask? BECAUSE, I have a teensy eensy request from you for that day: I would like you to bring your spare change/any money you'd like to donate so that the Delaware Sophs can rock at BLING BLING during O-week training.

What is Bling Bling, you ask? It's a massive all-soph-teams (hundreds of people) game, where we try to collect as many points as we can in our own team's bucket. Pennies are worth 1 point each, and everything else is worth negative points. The object of the game is to come away with the most points, and it is mayhem while the teams scramble to take silver and bills out of their buckets and put them in the buckets of other teams. In defense, teams can engineer ways to prevent other teams from putting money in their buckets--last year, the Eng team had their bucket mounted on a pole only accessible by ladder. Please bring any spare change you have lying around in a change bucket somewhere and help support T-Fox and Shinerama that way! All of your change will go towards charity.

Okay.

Done.

Why am I doing all this charity stuff, you ask?

So we won't ever have to do this again.

Super fired up for the rest of summer,
Tiff-o-rama

h'AMINALS!

2006-07-09T20:40:00.000-04:00

Yesterday, Kev and I went to the zoo. The day before, we took part in a Summerlicious dinner at Mistura, which was indeed Summerlicious. We then attempted to head to Dundas and Yonge to just walk around, only to notice that we were both super tired from travelling and work and attempted to head home, only to keep missing our stops because we were trying to master Golf Tour on my cell phone. When we finally got it right, we headed back to Yorkdale to pick up the car and went home.

Church, dim sum, softball. Ascensions are 4-0!

The following are some of the pictures from our zoo adventure. I knew it was going to be a good day yesterday when I saw Mary Ruby working the parking booth--she gave us free parking!

Dear God: Did you mean to make the giraffe like that, or was that a mistake?

Kev and an endangered Przewalski's horse

Tiff poking an endangered Przewalski's horse in the butt

Kev: Reindeer aren't real!
Tiff: They're RIGHT THERE. Flying reindeer aren't real.
Reindeer have velvety antlers. They're fuzzzzzy. They'd also probably be terrible at hide-and-seek. Look at that one in the middle hiding behind the rock.

Komodo Dragon, full of blood-infection-causing saliva

Wallawallawallaby

Cheetah
Hippopopopotamuseseses. They didn't move at all the entire time we were watching them. "Hellooo, are you alive?"

Warthogs! Baby Warthog!

Heffalump with food stuck on its tusk (maybe it was intentional, I don't know)

Babooooon. (not shown: stupid woman getting it riled up by hitting the glass. Repeatedly. Remarking, "Look, I'm mocking it!") My verdict: throw her into the Komodo Dragon tank

Lizzzzzard who posed oh so nicely

Reticulated python, a.k.a. a Bigass Pile of Snake

Flutterby

Humongous fish

Tiffany loves animals. And her camera. She hates glare off windows, but appreciates the fact that there was glass between her and the bigass snake.

Tiffany is...

2006-07-06T08:59:00.000-04:00

...staring at your wenis.
...reading The Hobbit
...hoping her 25% essay doesn't suck

oh sorry, that's Facebook.

Which, you will be glad/devastated to know, I am not trolling 48 hours a day anymore, because my 10 hour work day is kind of possessive and prefers I spend time with him and not that other guy. If he had access to a computer he'd probably make me pie charts and graphs recording my time usage, like that story about the guy who broke up with that girl using a Powerpoint presentation.

Being in the pool for several hours a day is sucking the moisture out of my skin like...[insert witty simile here, that may be sexual in nature and include the phrase "two bit whore", but you didn't hear that from me]...to the point where whole sections of my limbs turn white. On the up side, I love my job, at least until they fix the heater that's keeping the pool "too warm". I'm not tempted to toss any non-swimmers into the deep end yet, though if kids keep peeing in the pool (read: more than that one time yesterday, to my knowledge) I just might.

On the plus plus side, I get to teach a parent-and-tot class and the babies are super cute.

On the triple-plus-with-bonus side, it is the Tiff and Kev extravaganza weekend...this weekend! Saturday? Chilling? Maybe? Anyone? Evening, after the zoo. Let me knooooow.

Once more, with pictures

2006-06-27T14:43:00.000-04:00

Extra Western DBR Fun! Be sure to watch the video of Team Captain Viv being dragged into the fountain. Dan yells, "everyone! Get Cyrus!" at the end, and Cyrus ends up being picked up by Ian the Asian Clark Kent Lookalike and put into the fountain. I wonder if we have that on video too. [EDIT: yes we do!]

Pacer ladies

Rocking hardware around our necks

Twinsies!

Viv about to be dragged to the fountain, while Dan contemplates being spanked with a paddle (he got spanked with the paddle later)

Drunken Dragons get it on

2006-06-26T11:33:00.000-04:00

72 University Final B
TCBA Day 2 Sunday
Race Time 9:50
Lane Team Time Place

2 McMaster University
Holy Mac-a-Row-ni 2:29.91 4

3 University of Western Ontario
Drunken Dragons 2:25.26 2

4 University of Toronto Scarborough
UT Scarlem DB 2:20.61 1

5 York University
Seawolves 2:30.88 5

6 University of Toronto Faculty of Medicine
Pacemakers 2:26.83 3

105 Premier Mixed Final G
Pizza Pizza Day 2 Sunday
Race Time 15:40

1 Mount Sinai Hospital
Sinai Lightning 2:21.12 2

2 University of Western Ontario
Drunken Dragons 2:21.86 3

3 Wong's Association
Wongs Imperial Dragons 2:22.39 4

4 University of Toronto Scarborough
UT Scarlem DB 2:20.08 1

5 St Marguerite d'Youvillie Teachers
DY Dragons 2:28.37 5

6 Peel District School Board
Ai Ke Dragons 2:29.67 6

Look at the time difference between the top three teams in our second race! a;sldkfja;lieeulaajgh! So close. When we finished we had no idea who had won, because the entire time we were neck-and-neck with both teams on either side of us. It was a sweet race though, because we ended up dropping 2 seconds off our best time that weekend, and 4 seconds off from the morning.

Barbara was on Mac-a-row-ni, and Jeff was on the Seawolves. Sure, you made fun of our lavender uniforms...but it's what the people wearing them can do that counts, right? ;) Seriously, baby purple is going to be the new pink. Pink is overdone now. Guys need a new colour to flaunt.

Little Cousin Steph was our drummer for the first day, so we had the advantage and added amusement of having a little 65 lb girl sitting terrified and having a great time at the front of our boat. Other teams tried to recruit her too, but that didn't work out. The second day she couldn't come, so we had gimpy Brian who couldn't paddle with the stitches in his wrist as our drummer in our last race, so it was great to have a boatload of Western people without any subs or outsiders in our last and best race of the weekend.

After our final race we took lots of team pictures, and the boys all picked up our team captain and coach and carried her all the way from our team area to the big fountain and dragged her in, much to the amusement of everybody who saw the parade on the way and the people near the fountain, who clapped and laughed. All the way we treated it like a DB race to keep the boys from dropping her, calling out "power series, okay go! Hit! Hit! Hit! Hit! Now...lengthen! And....almost there...FINISH!". What a bunch of nerds. DB nerds.

All in all, it was a weekend full of sun, and only 6 hours of sleep over two days, and people, and beach vollyball and beach football, and teamness. The weather was perfect, and it really felt good to be racing again. For a team that was in a rebuilding year, I think we did really well. Ryerson was in a similar position to us last year with the newbies and the not-so-fast-ness, but they placed 3rd in the A division University Cup this year (New College won it), and raced in C division for the Premier Mixed division this year after rebuilding their team. Ye-ah.

The wait for the ferry back home was kept from being terribly boring by a bunch of people who had a bubble machine and were blasting "I'm Too Sexy" and the YMCA song and dancing, so all within earshot were entertained.

Team dinner at East on Queen St., where the waiter was amused when we passed down glasses of water to the rest of the table calling "hit" and "sync" and "power series", and "left side, you're not pulling your weight" (are there "dragonboat nerds"?), then home, where I promptly flopped onto bed after showering and fell asleep, full of Thai red curry and while talking to Kev on the phone.

Pictures later.

This is the worst post ever

2006-06-21T12:56:00.000-04:00

Sweeeeet new Christina Aguilera song "Ain't No Other Man" from her throwback album. I'll learn to love and accept her Marily Monroe obsession, eventually, as long as that means she never goes back to her "Fighter" phase when it looked like Marilyn Manson dressed her in the morning. I'll take the precious blonde ringlets over brows that looked like they were done in a booze haze and a penchant for ugly black clothing. That's right, my love is conditional, but I still think her voice is stellar. My favourite thing about her is that she's so good live. Take that, Hoobastank. And Avril Lavigne. Why would they ask Avril of all people to perform at the closing ceremonies in Torino? What kind of person is going to want to come to Vancouver in 2010 now?

What have I been up to?

Summer course!

Planning a charity club night downtown to raise money for Terry Fox and Shinerama, to take place at Afterlife on Friday August 11th, so heads up! More details to come. Plan to attend. Every cent (minus drink money) goes to charity.

I feel like I've been really busy considering I don't have any regular obligations other than softball on the weekend, which is going well, as I finally have the chance to practice how to bat and throw and catch and all those things that are essential to good softball.

Toronto International Dragonboat Festival this weekend at Centre Island! Going to be sandwiched between the two Mac teams in one of our races--bring it on, Barbara.

BBQ will happen, probably August because I realized I might have an exam on the 29th.

Enoch is leaving for basic training July 1st, say bye to him, because from that date on the army owns him.

Kev is coming hoooome at the end of June, and we are going to the Zoo for his birthday. Haha.

Worst post ever.

The Past is Beefy

2006-06-13T19:22:00.000-04:00

So Jenny and I were rooting around on our computers while procrastinating on the demon that is Facebook and we found all these really old pictures of us from back in the day, when we were like 9 years old onwards with the swim club.

One that stood out was the following...I give you my right bicep, circa Ontario Provincial Championships in Nepean two years ago. Jenny is in the background, pre-chopping off her really long ponytail.

Hey! Remember when my hair was short? Yeah.

Anyway, old hilarious pictures up on Facebook under "NYAC".

Urbana '06: Learn. Be. Go. Serve. Ask.

2006-06-13T17:11:00.000-04:00

Urbana's back! This ginormous, once a threar (er, every three years), 5-day conference in St. Louis, MO featuring hundreds of seminars and misison agencies, literally tens of thousands of students from campuses across North America.

It's InterVarsity's 21st Student Missions Convention, from December 27-31, 2006.

If you're interested, register soon! June 15th is the early bird deadline, and I have registration codes for money off. A great number of people from my church are going so if you're worried about not being able to get down there or having nobody to room with, please worry no more.

You can take a look at some of the specialized seminar tracks here.

:)

My most futile letter to date

2006-06-06T16:03:00.000-04:00

Dear Irene the European Hairstylist who Wears Too Much Eyeliner,

I hate you. You are nice enough, but please: never go near my hair again.

Let me express my disdain for hairstylists who:
-can't cut a whole head of hair using real scissors and must use the cheap cop-out that is stupid layering scissors or razor cutting, which is akin to trying to sell me low-carb brownies (Who would want to eat a low-carb brownie? Precisely, nobody in their right mind. Same goes for layering scissors, which make your hair look like crap when it grows out because the layers are random and uncontrolled.)
-need me to tilt my head at odd angles so they don't have to move themselves. Hey, here's a great idea: you move.
-talk to their other European lady-friends while blowdrying my hair
-turn away from me while doing the above
-feel the need to take all of my hair into the round brush at the same time--it isn't wool, lady, back off and do it in layers already, like a good stylist
-give me borderline neck strain from me fighting to keep my head straight while doing the above. Again, it isn't wool, lady, it's attached to my head.
-clean the little bits of hair on the floor with the blowdryer
-not give me the haircut I wanted in the first place: layers, Irene, do you know what they look like? If I can barely tell what you did to my hair, chances are you did a bad job
-expect me to pay 48 dollars and fifteen cents for their shitty job. I would've given you ten for the amount and quality of your work, Irene but I suspect that would have been illegal.

Thanks for nothing,
Tiffany

That will teach me to avoid my tight-pants-wearing skinny Chinese man-stylist, who--though he sighs in exasperation at my refusal to perm my thick wavy hair straight--charges less, is a maniac with the scissors, makes me feel like I have my very own gay-man hairdresser and has competent assistants who can blowdry my hair straight without burning my ears or scraping my forehead with the round brush.

I have a newfound love for James the man-stylist.

Milking the "it's my birthday" card

2006-06-03T13:21:00.000-04:00

For posterity's sake, I think it necessary to record my first clubbing experience in Toronto.

Firstly, thanks to the peoples who came and bought me (very late) birthday drinks.

My call to the drugstore
"I'm on antibiotics--can I drink?"
"Yes, but in moderation. Just beware of diarrhea."
"Alright cool, thanks."

All in all--I prefer London. The good thing about London is that whenever you go out, everyone goes to Western, and you're bound to run into someone(s) you know, whereas in Toronto, it's pretty much you and your muchachas, unless you happen to club all the dang time at the same place, and your friends happen to do the same. We did see a guy who looked like a cross between Usher and Terrence Petit though (he also wore sunglasses indoors), and he was shakin' it hardcore on the podium with me and Robyn and Webnesh.

Let it be known, for the record, that one of the first things Robyn and I commented on was how short everyone was.

Asian Night? Neeeeeeh. Not that I don't love my Asians, but I don't think I'm too fond of the Asian clubbing crowd. Not my vibe. Do you know what I mean?

Plus, they didn't play Promiscuous.

There were, however, podiums. I don't know about you, but dancing with your butt roughly at eye level to everyone else next to a lighted counter is weird, only not in that "dancing with my guy friends would probably feel like incest" kind of way. Next stop: Jim Bob's with poles, and the Phoenix with cages in London, hah!

To top it off, it was raining, which was excellent after being inside humid! sticky! Afterlife and we all got drenched walking back to the subway station.

Wewt.

Essay time. I promise to stop milking the birthday thing now.

Still Righteous

2006-06-02T09:45:00.000-04:00

I got up "early" to read my book, honestly.

Clearly not doing that.

I am, however, listening to Nelly Furtado's "Promiscuous" on endless repeat. That girl sure impresses me. Every album is New! Fresh! Funky!

"She sort of reminds me of Gwen Stefani"
"Yeah, minus the crazy, and the kidnapped Japanese schoolgirl posse"
"The song is kind of like 'My Humps'"
"I guess, minus the stupid"

I do love Gwen, but seriously, ever since she left the boys of No Doubt she's gone completely nuts.

I'mma get the new Nelly Furtado album when it comes out. Along with The Producers on DVD.

Okay, okay, Story of the Treasure Seekers time.

Not nearly high enough

2006-05-31T22:21:00.000-04:00

Day two of wisdom teeth extraction post-op, and I'm feeling kind of gyped. I feel like I should be righteously riding some sort of maxed-out Tylenol 2 codeine-filled high right now and what am I doing instead? Righteously procrastinating on this Peter Pan essay I'm supposed to be writing.

No matter, I suppose I shall just stockpile my codeine for recreational use second year.

I'M KIDDING. sort of.

All that aside, I'm very pleased with how the surgery went. I was up and about, pain free (though puffy), and malling with galpal Robyn at Yorkdale the day after. We saw X3 (uhm...sure, Jean Grey looked terrifyingly attractive just standing there until the last 2 minutes, but man, like two things happened in that movie and it took two hours to play out), and lustfully eyed everything at Sephora.

Oh, the glamour! Makeup fit for rockstars and drag queens, so trashy and divine, dripping shimmery glamour in the form of huge disco lashes and palettes of bold rainbow shadows waiting to be streaked across high cheekbones and past arching eyebrows. It would be enough to make anyone take a second glance and wonder if you got your junk tucked in by a man in a white coat or if it's just a little surprise waiting hidden under that cute black mini.

Leave me in there to die, please, with a legion of clean blank faces to play with.

I'll make you a lover, a harlot, a man in disguise...
you can be a rockstar or the cracked out groupie,
or a babydoll lolita with something to hide.
No masquerade--real faces covered in shimmering dirty secrets
Play a role, just for tonight, and go back to the world in the morning
I'll find you the matching stilettos,
or 10-inch Mary Janes with a silver clasp
we can go party because the world is our stage
and we the performers, born to entertain.
So let me strip you down and make you up...

*sigh*

(heart) Banquet

2006-05-29T01:24:00.000-04:00

I had to post some of these, they're gold. Thanks, B!

Young Khashayar! Way to be discreet, Barbara! (The plan was to take lots of pictures always with him in the background so we could analyze him from all angles)

J apparently has his rap face on.

Now J has his crazy face on.

Adam being camera shy on purpose.

Look at all the Presidents! (in chronological order from L-R...note the Asianness)

No dessert love for the Bacon.

The Farrow is just nuts.

"Do you like my lobster picture?"
"Oh, is that what that was? I was thinking something else."
He'd better not say 'Gundam' "Oh yeah, what?"
"Gundam"

The Boy

2006-05-28T16:56:00.000-04:00

Eric made a post about The Marian, which, to him, means I have to make a post about The Kevin now.

The conversation went something like this:
Tiffany: ...hey, does this mean i have to do a kevin post now?
Eric: tiffy: the answer is monosyllabic, and it ain't 'no', honey.

He also challenged me to out-cute him, so really, this post is not so much about Kev as it is about one-upping my arch-nemesis Eric Akaoka.

I kid, I kid.

To be honest, the details are pretty blurry, because I am the type of person who forgets details of this kind. Unfortunately for our anniverary date (which we tried to figure out once, but gave up because we couldn't remember), so is Kev. On the plus side, we're never going to be mad at the other person for forgetting. This, in fact, is cute, and not a testament to what huge flakes we are.

We met during O-week (I think) in the caf. He was wearing a blue zipup sweater and introduced himself as Kevin, or "my friends call me K-Swiss" (because he's half Korean, half Swiss--which they totally don't, and to this day I'm adamant he said that just to sound cool). Sometime between then and whenever we were 'officially' together we did a duet for Med/Syd Coffeehouse, he would come up to my floor at two in the morning (what kind of person assumes someone would be up then, geez) to chat in the hall, I would go down to his floor and make fun of his Asian glow, and really saw each other only in passing as our schedules were completely opposite.

We talk about saving the world, helping the poor, travelling Europe, Coldplay, God, small furry animals and how great it would be to have such warm fluffy contraband in our res rooms all year, and how spectacular Christina Aguilera's voice is. We play Dance Dance Revolution sometimes, but he always wins, especially on Super Duper Extreme Advanced Azn Mode. He also makes me think about philosophical things and flat-out berates me like my mother when it's necessary.

I tell him to stop dropping n-bombs inappropriately to avoid getting a cap in his ass (not even black belts can dodge bullets, you know), and to not cram fifteen five-syllable words into the same sentence, for the sake of others. I remind him to watch House every week, and make sure I have it on my computer for the times he misses it, which is more often than not. I am also the type of girlfriend who would ask her boyfriend to take a kick in the jewels for charity because she is one of the charity reps for the soph team that her boyfriend is also on. He's the type of boyfriend who would say yes, and then realize he perhaps should have considered the possible medical consequences beforehand.

I guess you'd call a person like that a "keeper".

He's perhaps the most articulate person I've ever met, the kind of guy you can strike up a conversation with about absolutely anything, however abstract or inane, yet either way he'll treat the conversation as if it were the most precious thing in the world to him at that very moment--and mean it, too. He's got a passion for music and a heart for God, and he makes me happy to no end (except for when he tips potted plants over on my desk).

Oh yeah, and he sleeps like an angel.

You should all meet him--soon, I hope.

The rest is history in the making. Five (six?) months later and we still write lame emails to each other more often than necessary, so we must be doing something right.

Sure, Eric Akaoka had pictures, but seeing as how everyone's already seen Kev topless...I have video! Kev on the piano a few months ago covering Coldplay's Don't Panic.

Do I win? :)

------

Editor's Note: Kev would like me to tell you that his friends do indeed call him K-Swiss, and I am a dirty liar for saying otherwise. (For the record: nobody really calls him K-Swiss)

Disneyworld!

2006-05-23T15:26:00.000-04:00

Let me sum up my trip in two words: Awesome Ratio.

Not for me, of course, but in our little 'group' of 10 or so people there were 2 guys and 8 girls.

Pictures here.

Day 1: arrival in Orlando
-gallivanting around Old Town (an amusement park near our hotel)
-people going on the World's Tallest Skycoaster (some 300 feet...a la Extreme Skyflyer at Wonderland)...Scott R. screaming like a little girl. Loudly.
-swimming in the outdoor pool

Day 2: Epcot
-morning wakeup calls...pictures of people still in bed
-morning performance at a local (wealthy!) middle school (in pictures: note the walls of the music room and the soundproof practice booths)
-drumline-esque percussion sendoff by 6 or 7 middle school students who were better than all of the Woburn percussionists put together times 10
-rides! Lots of Fun! Educational! rides.
-SnoCones at the Japan pavillion ("Now I am geisha too!")
-highlight: "Soarin", where you "fly" over really amazing scenery...complete with wind-in-yo-face and what I like to call "smellovision"

Day 3: Magic Kingdom
-morning performance at Epcot
-discovering that FastPasses are the greatest invention known to man, third only to the printing press and sliced bread
-immeasurable satisfaction when walking by the (very long, very slow) "standby" line for Space Mountain with our FastPasses
-SpectroMagic parade at night, and fireworks

Day 4: MGM studios
-people tired and sick of being out in the 30 degree plus weather all day for the third day in a row
-Tower of Terror multiple times...once with 17 of the 21 people on the ride being Woburn students, which was cause for the Farrow to buy a ride picture for the music room
-highlight: Rock n' Rollercoaster ft. Aerosmith. You walk into the building on a "tour" of the studio that Aerosmith is recording in, get "invited" to their concert, and board the "stretch stretch limo" coaster car that shoots off from a FLAT START as opposed to an incline start, and whip around in the dark marked with glow in the dark road signs to arrive at a VIP red carpet area for the "concert".

There were surprisingly few roller coasters at the three parks we went to at Disneyworld...(I hear there are more at Universal Studios), but the amazing thing about every single ride was that it was the complete package--not just "the ride". For example, Tower of Terror is a very Drop Zone-esque ride, but instead of just standing outside for an hour waiting to freefall for 5 seconds, from the moment you enter the Hollywood Tower Hotel you're walking through old hotel rooms, waiting to get on an old service elevator in the boiler room of a decrepit hotel basement. Every aspect of every ride, from the people who work there, to the lineups, to the gift shop that waits at the exit of every ride, it's so amazingly put together.

Also, I didn't get a tan, despite being out in the blazing sun for three days. Stupid sun protection.

The bus rides didn't feel as long as I'd expected...they were actually a lot of fun, and a lot of the time was slept away (rather uncomfortably, as the air conditioning came out the sides of the bus and the windows cold to lean on, and there was the inevitable head-lolling and neck pain) or spent watching movies (Chicago, Moulin Rouge, Be Cool, Memoirs of a Geisha, Big Fish, perhaps others), taking pictures, making fun of people...etc.

Now I am back with a cold that started creeping on me as we came home on the bus. Music Banquet this Friday, dudes. Tell Council if you want in.

Birthday Love

2006-05-15T23:24:00.000-04:00

Aw, MSN shoutouts.

Thanks for the calls, messages, emails, facebook comments, and offers to shower me with gifts!

Did I do anything special today? Not really. I slept in, tweaked my Children's Lit essay, and bummed around at home.

I did, however, celebrate on Sunday with my family and some family friends. We ate cake and were merry.

Monday night was Adrian and Tiffany's 19th Birthday Cow-eating Extravaganza at The Keg with Corey and Webnesh. Having one friend who works at The Keg and gets massive employee discounts is enough. Two would be murder. The amount of food we had between the four of us was retarded. And it was all so gooood. It's unfortunate I decided to upload pictures that afternoon and then forget to put the memory stick back into my camera, or else there'd be pictures for showing. We shared a bottle of wine and toasted to happiness and long life and birthdays, and ate like we had some sort of vindictive agenda against the cows of the world.

Saturday, of course, was the Soph Splash Bash on The Bridle Path (!) and I got to celebrate with ten of my fellow Deli Sophs, and it was X-rated. (Uhm, Deli being in the shape of an X)

The boy gets home tonight!

Drunken celebrations will be put off until the weekend after May 2-4. I believe the plan is to go to Afterlife for Asian night. Uhm, hooray! You are all invited.

I leave for Disneyworld tomorrow. Between all the birthday love I got, a trip to Disneyworld, and 1/3 of the new Prius, this birthday gets filed under "Awesome" in my books.

...have you filled out the 2006 Census? I know I have. Will you let them release your info 92 years from now? My dad put "no" for me, in case I'm still alive then (thanks), and incredibly famous/influential. I wouldn't want people to know how much I made or where I worked back when I was 18 now, would I?

Early belated birthday plans

2006-05-14T22:58:00.000-04:00

Hey.

Will you put on your dancing shoes and come to my birthday clubbing bonanza (uhm, also Adrian and Alex...I guess)? Friday or Saturday of next next (not May 2-4, the one after) weekend.

Uhm, I don't know where to go in Toronto though, so...I think the plan is that you guys are going to take me somewhere. Maybe we can go hang out with a million asians at Afterlife. Glow glow glow glow glow.

Yes.

The plan for Tuesday is I'm going to buy alcohol just because I can, and if they don't card me I'll be upset.

Comment! Comment! Commeeeeeeeeent.

"Eat your burger!" "I...can't..."

2006-05-13T23:22:00.000-04:00

Totally unrelated, but funny: Makes me want to hear wrist violin.

Soph Splash Bash on the Bridle Path! I'm telling you this only because it means I can say I have a friend who lives on The Bridle Path(!) and I am therefore cool (and wealthy) by association. I can sum up the house with the following words: bathrooms everywhere, themed rooms (with matching furniture), indoor pool, sauna, tennis court, chandeliers. That entire area is dripping with so much luxury it almost makes me want to hurl--in a good way, if there is such a way. So tempted to press the intercoms at the front gates of the houses...

We had the Biggest Burgers Ever...two inches thick and took a full 30-40 minutes to cook because they were so incredibly massive and frozen. Cake-mix birthday cake (!) decked out in equal parts of cake and icing and double the amount of Ferrero Rocher chocolates still sitting in their wrappers.

Drunk people doing backflips into the pool, smart, and 10 people in a sauna while listening to one of the sophs sing a song she made up entitled Everyone Thinks that You're Pregnant. "You think that you're starting to show, that area's starting to grow, you think that nobody knows--but everyone thinks that you're pregnant". It's ingenious, and she sounds like a vocal major.

Kev is back in two days, and straight back to London for summer school. Harrumpf. Maybe I should make a Kev-post, since I told Eric to make a Marian-post. Maybe. Maybe we'll be all sickening and make posts about each other and take up walking around with our hands in each other's back pockets and wearing matching clothing. YEAH.

Mmm, Lit.

2006-05-12T10:37:00.000-04:00

Finally, I've got the ball rolling. All my web access problems with webCT are fixed, I have access to my course material online instead of having to badger one of my friends to email me notes every week, I've finished my essay a week early so I don't have to worry about it while at Disneyworld, and damn I'm even reading ahead. What a keener. It helped that one of the essay topics was...(drumroll please):

Identity in Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland and/or Through the Looking-Glass: How is identity established/threatened/maintained?

My, my, my, if it isn't almost exactly the same thing Webnesh and I did for our Alice project back in grade 11. Hallelujah for Your foresight! Saved me a lot of time having to look up notes because most of them were already there, with quotes...and I wrote my essay in record time.

Regular English? Screw that, I don't want to have to do poetry analysis. I'd rather read Matilda and Charlotte's Web again for marks.

Completely by accident, I've now become a part of the Masters swim club that trains out of the YMCA near my house. I was there Wednesday night (at 8, of all times to be working out) and saw a bunch of foreign middle aged men (and some 20-something guys) looking rather teamish...and one of the past-middle-aged men asked me in a European accent if I wanted to join in. Turns out he was the head coach of the crew and training with the Masters is free as long as you have a Y membership. How sweet is that? It's perfect. I get to do what I love without the pressure of having to train for competition. I happened to join during an easy week (excellent, I hadn't been in the pool for about a month), becaues the Head Coach is headed to the World Masters Championships or something like that, and the sets were short and fast, which my out of shape body could handle. So if all goes according to plan, I will be swimming with a bunch of mostly middle aged men, and one middle aged woman for the rest of the summer.

Settings!

2006-05-07T18:01:00.000-04:00

Vaseline and eyeliner for contrast.

-----

P.S. Love music. Would it be arrogant of me to call myself a muse? I think so.

Oh yeah, my birthday's soon.

2006-05-06T16:32:00.000-04:00

Hey, remember when turning sixteen was so far away and such a Big Deal? I do.

Birthday Countdown: 10 days.

Would you like to buy me the fixin's for hundreds upon thousands of delicious polar bears? I would like to lovingly touch whoever came up with the idea of making an alcoholic drink that tastes like mint chocolate. I can only hope that my children also grow up to be geniuses in a similar fashion, concocting magical elixirs named after furry animals.

I'll most likely be working away madly at my essay on the day of my birthday, but if some of you's aren't too busy in the evening you are welcome to come over and have some cake. This is your invitation, let me know.

----------

And with every birth there must be a death to balance out the universe...

My trusty little Accord of 15 years died. It was on its last legs yesterday after coming home from the repair shop in seemingly perfect condition, but something was amiss when the battery light stayed on longer than usual, and the engine kept revving while in Park. The last I saw it it was resting peacefully in my driveway, recovering from whatever ailment it was suffering, on top of recuperating from the various procedures performed on it the day before, and when I returned home from dragonboat practice it had already been pronounced dead and removed.

If I had to bury it and give it a headstone, I'd have the following engraved onto it: Here lies a camel-coloured '91 Accord, a bastard that couldn't hold on for just three and a half more months and die at a more convenient time for the sake of everyone--you should have died before we paid $300 to have you fixed so that we could buy more fancy underwear or perhaps contribute $300 more towards efforts to end world hunger.

Probably wouldn't fit though, so I'd just take the first letter of every word and make a huge acronym...or whatever it's called when you take the first letter of every word and make a huge acronym...possibly not an "acronym". Eric would know, but I don't.

Out of ~~need for a second vehicle~~ spite, my parents bought a Toyota Prius today. It will be here in two weeks. Hear that? You, Mr. Accord, are replaceable.

Literary Adventure

2006-05-05T22:57:00.000-04:00

The Best Feeling in the World (almost):

Finally registering for the online course you've been stalking on the Registrar's website for days hoping for an opening.

Crappiest consequence(s):

Finding out you are already 2 units behind, missed a quiz, and won't get your mandatory course readings delivered from the university bookstore until Tuesday.

Finding out you have an essay due the Friday you are in Disneyworld, meaning advance work and extra readings in a course that is 8 months condensed into 3, that you are already 5 days behind in.

A LOT OF ANXIETY.

Biggest resulting accomplishment (driven by anxiety):

Narrowing down your 26-book hunt to 5 with the help of your Grade 12 English teacher, your bookworm cousin whom you thought always bought way too many books for her own good, and random friendsies.

On that note, I still need the following:

Harriet the Spy - Fitzhugh
Story of the Treasure Seekers - Nesbit
Princess and the Goblin - Macdonald
Complete Nonsense of Edward Lear - Lear
Tom's Midnight Garden - Pearce

Boring Summer Week 1

2006-05-03T16:54:00.000-04:00

I'm still not done unpacking--all that's left are the little...doodads that don't really seem to fit anywhere, and are now sitting in a basket in the middle of my room. They'll probably stay that way for another, oh, month.

In an effort to feel less useless at home, I'm going to voluntarily start painting next week. Then it is Disneyworld time, followed by more painting.

I'm also trying to register in an online Children's Literature course, stalking the website constantly for that magical "Not Full" indication--and I finally got it today, only to find out that I found out a whole 30 minutes too late, because the Registrar's phone line closes at four. On the plus side, if I can't call, nobody else can either, and since online registration is closed, it looks like I'll be up early tomorrow stalking and phoning.

My birthday's in two weeks, but I think the celebrating will be postponed, as we leave for Orlando on the 17th.

Oh, and it looks like there'll be a barbecue sometime this summer. Keep that tradition going, I think. But only if y'all are coming.

In other news, Kev is in Ecuador for two weeks to get his humanitarianism on, and then he's off to London right away for summer school, which has undoubtedly caused me a great deal of separation anxiety, though at this point it's probably more like withdrawl, and once the nausea, sweating, shakes, and irritability wear off it'll be like he never left. Hee.

Uhm, and finally, it is now Hang Out With Tiffany time, isn't it? Yes?

Honey...

2006-04-28T23:57:00.000-04:00

I'm home!

For reasons beyond my comprehension, I had so much stuff to move out. I remember moving in with Two Items. A duffel bag, and a big box (maybe it was two)--plus two backpacks. I left with six laundry baskets, three laundry bags, two boxes, and the original duffel bag and two backpacks. Any more and I would've had to take the train home like this one did last year. Everything is sitting in my living room.

Four months of summer! Two months of work, Disneyworld in two weeks (!), getting my wisdom teeth out, and G license :) My mom has told me that "we" are painting the house, but I know that when she says "we" she really means me and my dad.

Overdue

2006-04-20T03:05:00.000-04:00

Well isn't this amazing--it's been 8 days!

It's also 3am during exam period, but ah, what the heck. I just wrote three exams in two days, and gave myself a day of sleeping until 4 o'clock in the afternoon and watching ten episodes of Season 6 of CSI (Las Vegas, which is the only CSI worth watching anyway).

So in between my pinky being kind of numb in a "gee, I hope I don't have a neurological condition that's causing left pinky numbness and muscle twitching down my ulna" kind of way, defrosting my drainpain-less (and therefore leaking every freaking where) fridge, writing exams, studying for said exams, and debating what to do with myself for ~~four~~ three months in the summer, I'm enjoying these last few days of school immensely.

I'm sure everyone says this, but it sure is weird almost being done first year. I remember the day I moved in, how homesick I was for two days, and time just flew by, especially after we got back from Christmas break. Crazy how time flies. I couldn't wait to leave high school, and now university is moving too fast for my taste. I could stay here forever, I think. Even more so if global warming decides to kick in a little more and the winters in London became less crappy.

As for next year: Corey's coming to Western, and I'm working on convincing Jesse and Jenny to come as well. Then they can apply to be in Delaware Hall and be my frosh, and it will be excellent.

As much as I hate to leave, I'm looking forward to being back home and catching up with everybody. Seems like it's been ages--but I suppose that's what I get for not going to U of T or York. But oh right: then I'd hate my life. BAHAHAHA! That's right, I went there. Just because I could.

Possibly NSFW

2006-04-12T04:11:00.000-04:00

I don't know what the policy is on posting pictures with half-naked boys, but I was really happy with the way they turned out after an impromptu photo shoot that basically involved me whipping out my camera and being really bossy and Kev being really topless. "Hey you. Take your shirt off. Look that way. And this way. Now stop moving for crying out loud, you're making the photos blurry. DO SOMETHING with your face, stop staring at me like that". I may just have to start a love affair with sepia and make more beautifully warm-toned, soft-edged babies with it.

Pardon the fact that it all looks vaguely like Korean propaganda, though I'm not sure what it'd be trying to say exactly if it were...

I'm still continuing my streak of sleeping until ridiculous hours of the day. I got up at 4:30pm yesterday after getting up briefly to pee and shove pasta down my throat.

Out the 27th!

I'm going to Disneyworld with WM in May!

Nothing is going on.

2006-03-31T21:07:00.000-05:00

The reason for my long absence:

Facebook is eating my life.

It's not as bad as I thought it would be...but if you kids wanna see pictures from Med/Syd Formal, hop on over. I'd have posted other pictures from things like Webnesh Visiting Western, and The Dragonboat Keg Party Where There Were Like 8 of Us Out Of A "Team" of 80, etc....but Kev sucks and hasn't given me the pictures yet.

Recently, I've been doing what anybody would call A Whole Lot of Nothing, which means sleeping until 6(pm) on a Friday, watching lots of CSI thanks to Julie who has every single season on DVD, and missing class.

Either I have mono, or it's the end of the year, or both. Last weekend I slept just as much as I was awake. Nice 24/24 split.

On the menu for the summer:
Disneyworld w/ woburnmusic (fingers crossed, yes)
CCSA softball
Dragonboat races
T3C daycamp (August)
return to Longlac! (July)

Which means I have nothing to do for a month and a half in June/July. Plans? Plans?

'Cause I got Facebook and now I'm gonna fail school anyway...

2006-03-23T17:31:00.000-05:00

...so I don't need to do my Calculus homework just yet.

Rules: people who get tagged need to write a blog entry about their 5 quirky habits as well as state this rule clearly. In the end, you need to choose the next 5 people to be tagged and list their names.

1. I overeat sometimes, and then attribute it to my complete lack of having to watch what I eat for most of my life because of my swimming career. I don't think that's quirky so much as just "bad". And then I'll have periods where either I eat constantly or eat next to nothing at all for days. This might be a disorder, I haven't decided.

2. I never clean my room unless it becomes completely unbearable, but "unbearable" involves probably something along the lines of wet feces on the ground left by some mystery animal...like a moose. Or when I can't find some shirt I'm looking for.

3. I'm a huge blog/facebook/whateverspace stalker...but only if they type in proper english and don't talk about every detail of what they did at school. "And then I had the most delicious tuna fish sandwich! lolerz ^_^!!! And then 4th period was English and--" I don't even know what happened after that because I got so bored I closed the window.

4. I take photos of myself. Lots of them. I'm a glamourpuss at heart. I'd project it onto others, but it'd probably get a little tense.

5. I save all those little packets of ketchup, plastic forks I don't use, salt, pepper, etc., because I don't like "wasting" them, and then they just sit in my house for years.

Next to do this: Kev, Neener, Michael, Eric, J,Sam

I chose six. Do it anyway!

This is the sound of non-productivity

2006-03-21T12:45:00.000-05:00

Mrrrph.

I remember when my life was a schedule; back-to-back, non-stop, go-until-you-think-you'll-drop-from-exhaustion-but-you're-really-tougher-than-you-thought action.

It was rewarding, it was brutal, and I was happy. I liked having hardly any time to sit around on my butt and do nothing--an activity which I do all too often nowadays for my taste. I miss the days when loitering around after Sunday service for half an hour deciding where to go seemed like an insufferable waste of time--because I needed every minute I could hoard just to keep myself afloat. I want to be committed to a million and a half things at once, and keep track of it all.

It seems like in the last few weeks I've become what I call, in technical terms a huge pansy. I could think of a billion excuses why I didn't get up to go to practice, why I slept in...but in the end, you and I both know there are no excuses. Do or do not. There is no try. Yoda knows where it's at.

I'm getting things done--and well, for that matter, but I don't feel productive. I feel like I'm letting the hours of the day slip through my fingers without having achieved as much as could have, as much as I used to.

I want to be used for great things, to live out the life I'm supposed to, and not feel as if I'm being bogged down by anyone. This drive is my strength. And when it pushes me to forsake others, it is my weakness.

But my heart is set on a pilgrimage to heaven's own bright King
So in faltering or victory I will always sing

And on the road to beautiful
My seasons always change
But my life is spent on loving You
To know You in Your power and pain --Charlie Hall, "On the Road to Beautiful"

Ishskwaday

2006-03-19T20:37:00.000-05:00

Ishskwaday: an Ojibwe term for fire--sacred fire, spirit fire

We cannot fully realize His majesty without diversity. We want radical community in the presence of this diversity.

Ishskwaday '06: A whirlwind conference to raise awareness regarding the issues First Nations people face across all aspect - legal, social; to inform people how it was "then" and "now"; to empower our First Nations brothers and sisters to minister to their own people. Attended by people across the country (including Inuit from Nunavut!), Native leaders and people like yours truly.

Re: residential schools - People ask me, "How can you be a Christian? Don't you know what they did to your people?" --Richard Twiss, keynote speaker from Lakota tribe

Re: worship - We're in a Korean Church. Why aren't we singing songs in your native tongue, dressed in your native dress? --Twiss

Religion and culture are not mutually exclusive. Christianity and culture are not mutually exclusive. Over the years, Christianity has been, as Richard Twiss put it, "bleached out". We've come to think of it in a certain way--it should look, smell, taste, and feel a certain way. We should play contemporary worship music on Yamaha drums and electric guitars, wear little Jesus-fish keychains on our backpacks, and stand solemnly behind a pew when we praise our Creator.

We're wearing social goggles.

It is with these goggles on that the missionaries who ran the residential schools in the attempt to assimilate the First Nations people into "White" culture. In their eyes, being a good Christian meant speaking only English, on threat of torture. It meant having short hair. It meant wearing English clothing. It meant suppressing their Native roots.

And we're still doing it now, putting the candy that is the main message of Christianity in a wrapper, handing it out and telling everyone "this is what candy should look like. The wrapper is what matters. The wrapper tells you what candy is inside", instead of inviting people to taste for themselves.

The worship celebration was led by Broken Walls, a native worship band who've toured worldwide and played at conferences such as Urbana. It was Native music. Native worship music. With them were dancers in full Native regalia, eagle feathers, moccasins and all, and we, mostly conservative Asians from conservative Asian churches who do half-heartedly go through Sunday worship with Yamaha drums and electric guitars and Matt Redman half the time, spent hours and hours praising God in a whole new way--in their own way. No Chris Tomlin, no Hillsong, none of that.

God gave us diversity. We see it mirrored in all of Creation. Why are we trying to make ourselves all the same when we give glory and praise back to him?

During the day there were workshops and seminars led by various people, ranging from Native leaders to lawyers involved in Aboriginal law to university professors. Lots of information in a short time, but all so valuable.

To top it all of, a busload of 40 or so teens from Long Lake #58 reserve (where I went last year!) came down to Toronto to participate in the conference, which means I got to see a bunch of people I met last year and just catch up. After the conference on Friday night we drove downtown to show them around the city, and Saturday night (Sunday morning, technically) they went bowling before heading back to Longlac early today. It gave me an odd feeling to talk to them and know that they have all these hopes and dreams like any other person, they laugh and cry and pull pranks; but at the same time they are broken--many of them grew up abused, a lot of the girls have kids at a young age, their siblings/relatives/parents are in and out of jail, they are surrounded by and in a world of alcohol and drugs. Off the reserve you can almost see them as any other person you'd meet walking down the street--it is only when you ask, when they let down their walls and show you what they've gone through and who they want to be that you can even glimpse how different their lives must be.

Final quotes from Richard Twiss, re: drums - Watch out for that big Indian drum right there. Indian spirits like to sneak into churches inside Indian drums. They're afraid of White Man drums though, so don't worry about these Yamahas right here. We should just tell Jonathan (from broken Walls) to put 'Yamaha' on his Indian drum.

re: growing up in the 70's - All the hippies loved me, they thought I was some sort of guru. We'd all eat mushrooms and then I would say stuff like 'When the chips are down, the buffalo is empty' and they'd be all like, 'Whoa, far out, duuuuuude!'

I was going to work for the City this summer, which would have involved forsaking a return to Long Lake #58 and summer camp at T3C but it seems I am being called in another direction entirely, I am being nudged to put what I've learned to good use, and to keep the fire alive.

Others:
Read what Brian from my missions team last year had to say about it here.

Door Penis: Evolution

2006-03-14T16:48:00.000-05:00

DACHSHUND!

Hee.

Tyra Banks has a fivehead

2006-03-13T21:27:00.000-05:00

How to tell you've been watching too much Top Model:

You do your hair and makeup and take pictures for no good reason whatsoever.

Give Sophie's celebration of her new Nikon camera combined with my completing three seasons of ANTM in the past five days credit.

My favourite:

Yes. Yes I am in a bathroom. I only wish I weren't taking one-handed shots because I hate it when a great shot gets cut off BECAUSE I CAN'T SEE WHAT I'M DOING.

I'm talented

2006-03-13T15:09:00.000-05:00

A few years back, I bought a book on making balloon animals.

I got to test my skillz this past weekend when we were decorating Emanuela's door for her birthday.

My first attempt turned out rather like a large door-penis with an extra testicle.

But then my giraffes turned out okay.

Other than that, I've been writing exams like it's my job and I love it, skipping classes (also like it's my job), and using the word "mad" as an adjective way more than I should. I've also been watching ANTM hardcore while "studying", because DC++ is my bountiful provider and MAN JAYLA FROM SEASON 5 IS MAD ANNOYING AND WHY DOESN'T DC++ HAVE SEASON 4 SO I CAN BASK IN NAIMA'S AMAZING GORGEOUSNESS.

Back in Toronto this weekend for Ishskwaday '06.

My babies will be made of sushi

2006-02-27T21:24:00.000-05:00

If and when I have children, they'll probably be made entirely of fish, green tea ice cream, and tapioca.

Man. Every time I come home it's a sushi and bubble tea binge.

The people who work at Ajisen Ramen at Warden & Steeles have to yell thank you and greet you in Japanese. They do this every time someone enters or leaves. None of them are Japanese. Their noodles are good, though they remind me more than vaguely of spaghetti. I'd go just for the novelty of being yelled at unintelligibly in Japanese and hearing them go "HAI!!" (with caps) every time you ask for a napkin and the way they try to take your bowl at every available opportunity (in such a manner that you can't even protest because they're looking elsewhere while they grab it) so they can seat more customers.

Yesterday I exercised my lottery ticket-buying privileges (for the first time!) and did scratch-and-win crosswords for an hour with my church boys before we stopped winning and therefore couldn't buy more crosswords with our winnings. Nixon won $10, and fueled our crossword scratching by generously spending $2 of it. And then the bubble tea people kicked us off their table even though we bought stuff from them and they didn't have any other customers. Shafty. Justified shaftiness I suppose. Being the only girl hanging out with a bunch of boys all afternoon just meant I heard the word "penis" like 50 times, thereby maxing out my "penis"-hearing quota for the next few days. Hooray!

Now, I don't have Facebook even though people keep telling me to get it. I say it's mostly because I'm over that whole "look how many friends I have by association and how many testimonials I can rack up!" (or whatever it is) phase, even if networking is everything, you crazy business kids--I suspect I also have a deep fear of setting myself up to fail all my courses because I'll be doing nothing but surfing around on Facebook for hours or even days at a time for the rest of the semester, because I am that type of person. The creepy Facebook-surfing-why-haven't-you-updated-it's-been-15-minutes stalker kind.

I came to this conclusion when I caught myself checking my email and surfing blogs every 10 minutes, hoping to catch those updates first. Bizzatches. Beware.

The obvious conclusion is you should feed my problems by emailing me all the time and updating constantly.

"Webnesh." "We--...sorry?"

2006-02-24T12:47:00.000-05:00

I have an exam tonight, which made this morning the perfect time to be deliciously lazy and skip all my classes so I can study. And by study, I mean sleep in and then update this thing.

Saturday to Tuesday was Webnesh's Grand Adventure at Western, which is what I like to call it. With a name like that you'd expect some sort of exuberant reunion, teary goodbye, and getting lost in the wilderness in between, when in actual fact we pretty much just picked up where we left off--four months ago.

We even did work.

Unfortunately, she was here with all these other UT and Mac-ers while The Plague struck down a bunch of us...and when I say unfortunate I mean "completely according to our secret plan of infecting all the other Southern Ontario universities with similar disesases". So now that you're all heading back to school after Reading Week...got a cold? With Love from Western. You can thank all your schoolmates who came to London this past weekend.

True to form, we stayed up superlate, talked about boys, and ate ice cream...we hung out with my floor and Kev's floor, had a good time trying to teach people Web's name, faced off in DDR (Tiffany FTW), went downtown with Kev, Serge, and Jeannine for dinner and dessert, chatted about spiritual things, took pictures around campus like we were Japanese tourists, and complained about how cold it was.

Our goodbye? Least. Climactic. Ever.

"Yay! I'm glad you came."
"Yay! I had fun."
"Bye Webnesh, call me when you get home!"
"Okay bye!"

And then she didn't even call. Punk.

Home tomorrow.

Soph'd

2006-02-18T12:46:00.000-05:00

Hello.

Once again I am battling a mild bought of the Plague, and I'm exceedingly glad that it's mild, as I have an exam in about in hour. NeoCitron is disgusting.

Webnesh is visiting me for four days, starting tonight! Cause for celebration.

Last night, after only an hour or so of waiting I got my soph call...I got a position on the Delaware soph team next year (hooray!), and as much as I'll likely gripe about how "man, now what am I gonna do with all my Med/Syd clothing" and "dammit, now I have to play flag football for West-Deli", etc., in the end, change is good and I'm very certain that's exactly where I'm supposed to be next year. Some people were up until 4 waiting for their calls (the later the better at Med/Syd), and tense times were had by all 109 people fighting for 37 spots.

...For the curious, Kev also got a a Deli soph position. Now we can flaunt our togetherness in front of all the froshies by walking around with our hands in each other's back pockets so we look like we're joined at the hip. And if we can pull that off without one of both of us throwing up from the awfulness of it all, we're set.

In other words, I'm excited for frosh week next year.

Yeah, other than that...I got nothin'. School, blah. Reading week in a week!

Dedication

2006-02-09T16:07:00.000-05:00

In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. (Genesis 1:1)

And in the beginning, two souls stepped out on a journey of questions and answers in an attempt to know God and deepen their faith.

This is my beginning. Our beginning. There is no finish line to wait at for the other person to catch up, no dragging--only pushing, forging ahead, on fire with urgency and desire to know what God's voice sounds like, what it feels like to walk in the power of the Spirit.

In between we will pause to be deliciously lazy, lounge around for hours on end in pyjamas and last night's makeup, warm and cozy while sunlight streams in through the windows.

We are a union of coincidences and uncertainties, a collision of unbounded potential we have only begun explore...which leaves me no choice but to believe and marvel at God's perfect planning and impeccable timing. Think of all the things that are possible. Think of all the things we could do.

There will be doubt, I am certain. But there are things much greater than our doubt, forces stronger than our little heads can fully grasp, and it is my prayer every day that we'll be on this journey of faith together--not for each other, no. For ourselves and our own personal relationship with our God and Father, but together nonetheless.

This is my commitment--to you and to my Lord and my God, with everyone who reads this as my witnesses: this year is going to be my massive journey of faith, and it starts now.

With my love,
Tiffany

Work done this weekend = 0

2006-02-06T14:03:00.000-05:00

Dear Student Card,

Where the hell are you?

How is it that you managed to escape from your usual resting spot of the back pocket of my jeans in the time it took me to eat breakfast and walk upstairs (all of 20 seconds), where I stayed for the next seven and a half hours, not even leaving the room to pee? To what dimension have you warped to, and more importantly, how?

In any case, if you have indeed upped and left me, I hope that you're living it up (but not spending any of the meal plan money that is on you) like I would with your companions Laundry Card and Bus Pass. Copy Debit Card won't be any help with the bill if you decide to go eat or something, because his balance is at zero.

Moreover, I hope you can't sleep at night knowing that I now have to live off plain bagels and apples from my food drawer, and I can't do my laundry or go to UCC gym for dragonboat practice without paying 2 bucks, or take the bus and have to walk every-freaking-where. Not that I ever leave campus, but that's completely beside the point.

Maybe you don't like me, but can't we come to some sort of agreement? Christmas and Thanksgiving with your dad or something, later curfew on weekends? Keys likes to wander off all the time, but she always comes back when I frantically search, why can't you be more like her?

Hmmpf. I suppose in the end it doesn't matter, because YOU ARE REPLACABLE. That's right, honey. I went there.

Thinking marks = 0

2006-01-31T19:26:00.000-05:00

I'm so not a "Part D: Application" kid. Being the absolute genius that I am, I enrolled in an applied calculus course this semester. I am now expected to know how to model growth rates of fish, and relative rates of growth of tree trunks vs. leaf stems from word problems. Why, oh why did I think this would be easier than doing math for the sake of doing math? I distinctly remember doing VERY POORLY on Mr. Heritage's "thinking" questions way back in Grade 10 math. That is how good I am at application. So good it has scarred me for life and haunts my dreams. I can't even solve problems that are slightly different from examples that've been done in front of my face. If I haven't seen it, chances are I won't be able to solve it.

Come on now.

In other news, dragonboat practices are kicking into hXc-gear, and the hardest part of it is just getting out of bed. But once I'm out and shivering in the cold, it's just like the old days. I'm less tired after getting up at the crack of dawn, working out for an hour and a half and then going a full 9:30-5:30 day of classes than when I sleep until the last possible second and have that same full day. I like it.

The iPod and I are doing fine, thanks. We had a few issues to resolve (he was being inconsiderate, uncooperative, and failing to communicate), but now I think we're ready to progress in our relationship and just enjoy each other's company. Plus he's sexy and oh-so-sleek.

No, really, I was just talking about my iPod.

As for Kev (AND JESUS), I think it's safe to say I wake up every morning a little more in love. And I'm pretty sure I have no inclination whatsoever to call Jesus "sexy". That's just wrong.

Johnny Cage, test your might!

2006-01-26T20:45:00.000-05:00

My iPod Nano is now in Mississauga at the Fedex sorting facility, after travelling from Shenzhen, China, to Anchorage, to Memphis, and finally 'Sauga.

MMMMMMMMMMMMM.

I guess it's nice to know that everything still comes from China.

Fedex tracking - Coolest. Thing. Ever. As is this Mortal Kombat techno remix I downloaded.

School is good, already sorting things out for next year. Interviews for Soph and RA, applying for summer jobs, etc. Blah blah lifeisgoodeverythingisfine.

Happy early Chinese New Year! I'll be here, chilling with my Caucasian brethren, and my family is coming up on Saturday. At night we're having a Chinese New Year Dance, complete with a balloon drop at midnight (????) and upbeat hiphop music, no doubt. Chinese New Year celebration at its finest--where are my lion dances, free money, and firecrackers? Plus all the Chinese kids will be going home to spend time with their families, so really it's more like an excuse for all the white kids to get drunk and have a dance. Yes. No, I like white kids, really--but seeing those Chinese New Year Dance posters makes me giggle every time.

Hee.

ACF Winter Retreat

2006-01-22T15:41:00.000-05:00

By grace, striving for maturity in Christ and thriving in unity for the body.

Two days. Four messages. Hours of worship music and prayer in earnest. Group Bible studies. Not sleeping at night. Trying not to sleep during messages.

I always come back from retreats and events wishing that so-and-so could have been there with me, or that such-and-such could have heard this message or that, or met this person or that person. I think of you all the time. If you're wondering, what about me? Has she thought about me? Chances are the answer is yes.

The past few weeks I've been distracted and preoccupied, purposely distancing myself from God because it seemed easier. I didn't even want to go to the retreat, really--I was, and still am, slightly behind in my work. Naturally, in situations like that there is The Voice At The Back Of Your Mind that urges you.

So I went, and I'm so glad I did. On Saturday evening after Pastor Junior's (The Incredibly Animated Trini Guy Who Told 'St. Peter at the Pearly Gates' Jokes) message, we had a short musical worship time that turned into a very, very long prayer/music time, and on my knees, in the dark, with people just playing music in the background and over 100 (azns) murmuring to our Father the desires of our hearts...just incredible. On my knees I crawled back in surrender to the One I would give up everything for, to the One who has paved my way and heard my cries in times of desperation.

ACF is just a huge family. With these people, I am at home. Nobody feels shy about opening up to anyone, there are no awkward silences. I point this out because I have only been to two meetings this year, and prior to this retreat I knew only a few names and faces...but even so, I felt like I belonged.

Christian retreats aren't just for Christians--DO NOT make that mistake. They're an opportunity to meet people, just have your questions answered--nobody will force you to believe, but you will see FOR YOURSELF why your friends are so passionate about some guy who walked the earth 2000 years ago.

It's with a sense of urgency that I ask you all: are you satisfied with what you know? Are you curious? There is no better time than now. You will never know unless you search in earnest FOR YOURSELF. But until you do, you are wandering in what you think is the truth, from what others have told you is the right way to live. So I am pressing you to find truth--step outside your boxy, comfortable lives so that you will know what it is you believe, or not believe. This goes for anybody, Christian or not: I beg you, do not be spoon-fed. Ask questions. Find answers. Move forward and mature not just physically but spiritually as well.

Get out there.

And to my brothers and sisters in Christ: pray for your campuses. Pray for your friends, the ones who are seeking, the ones who are hurting, that you will be a light to them, that their questions will be answered. Ask for the glory of God to fill you so that you overflow into everyone around you.

A-MEN BROTHA.

Dear everyone,

2006-01-18T20:59:00.000-05:00

There's this boy I love,

and he loves me too.

His name is Kevin, and he makes me happy.

Not doing homework already.

2006-01-14T14:15:00.001-05:00

Not to jump on the "maybe I'll stop posting" train that's getting rolling, but as of late I've felt no inclination. I hope for my sake it's just a phase.

-----

**I use the F word. Once.

You've lifted me so high I don't want to let you down. Have you ever felt that way? That when the people around you have jumped to positive conclusions about who you are, what you're capable of, your good qualities, what they see in you all too quickly--you feel that slight obligation to live them out, feel a little bit of fear in showing them your demons, feel more than a fair share of uncertainty when you open your mouth. It's a feeling that's plagued me as of late. Four months of new friends and I think I've yet to show anyone my ugliest side, or had to go through the subsequent period of avoiding each other and making up. It's almost despicable how badly I'd like to pull it out like a fucking disclaimer, like a billboard that says THIS IS WHAT YOU SIGNED UP FOR, SUNSHINE. I have been genuine, and have had no reason to be less than happy. I just wish.

Now tell me my loves, what storms have we weathered, and how will we hold when the waves come crashing at foundations of sand on which we have built our houses?

What will remain standing when the waters recede?

P.S.: Where are we headed in this ship we've dubbed love? Will you be with me forever, sickness or health, or be the first to leave when you realize I'm not who you think?

It comes as no surprise to me that some of my closest friends are the ones I've argued with, ignored for days, hated in the fourth grade, made fun of behind their back only to have them find out and hate me back, and written angsty 11-year-old journal entries about my allegiance to so-and-so but not so-and-so so that it would be documented forever...the same people I had sleepovers with, made fun of to their face knowing they had just as much dirt on me to hit me with a snappy comeback, the ones who weren't afraid to step up and tell me when I was being an idiot when I was (and also when I wasn't), and who're always able to make time for me when I need it, knowing that I'd do the same for them. Never have I been so aware of the fact that the people I grew up with hold much of how I came to be who I am today within them. Props to you, homies.

As the old schoolyard adage goes: the more he picks on you, the more he likes you!. Or something. So if I tell you I hate you all the time, I actually love you to bits. Unless of course, I actually hate you, which really takes waaaaaay too much effort and isn't worth my time. In conclusion, I don't hate anybody. Not even Paris Hilton.

-----

I am going out for dinner and then seeing Memoirs of a Geisha tonight. I guess you could call it a 'date'.

Second half

2006-01-09T14:13:00.000-05:00

Hello, Med/Syd res room and Western brethren, how I've missed you.

As expected, I got no sleep on the flight home, having slept the night before. Crying (puking) babies didn't help, they only stank up the cabin with, well, puke-smell, and annoying crying noises. I never did that when I rode on a plane at that age. Hmmpf. I did, however, meet up with a bunch of people I used to swim with also flying back home and we switched seats around and sat together and chatted it up. 2:55pm flight from HK airport on Saturday, we landed in Toronto around 7:30pm on Saturday Toronto time after a 12 hour HK-Vancouver flight, one hour transit (that involved me getting our massive amount of luggage and going through customs, ugh), and another 4 hour flight from Van-city back to Toronto. Time travel at its finest.

Back in London yesterday after spending the better part of the night unpacking and repacking. Three large suitcases, a suitcase-sized red/white/blue bag (yes, my fellow asians, one of those), two small suitcases and two backpacks later, I packed up my stuff to go back to Western.

Blondie rang the doorbell to come pick me up when I was still in bed, and I was so glad I stayed up superlate to pack everything so all I had to do was throw on a sweater, my coat, some last minute things, and run out the door.

So yeah. I'm back. And now I'm sick, which is just excellent. Whatever cold germs, or avian flu, or what have you I was fending off before has presented itself due to my lack of sleep in the past two days. First day of school was blissfully short, I am now free to drink lemon honey tea, curl up with a book, and do chemistry tutorial questions all night. Hoo-rah.

Hi!

2005-12-31T08:28:00.000-05:00

Hello from HK, and Happy New Year everyone!

Indeed I have filled my suitcases with stuff (so cheap that it'll be painful to ever buy anything in Toronto again), my camera(s) with pictures, my belly with tasty tasty Chinese food (I'm pretty sure I haven't been the slightest bit hungry since the plane touched down a week and a bit ago), and am very excited to go back to Toronto, if only for half a day before I'm back in London.

I've been doing a lot of sightseeing, seeing old friends, taking hundreds of pictures, and shopping to my little heart's content with the 6.7 exchange rate and no tax. My money has gone very far.

I hope you're all enjoying your break.

Non-Western brethren--leave some space open for me during the last week of February! Or come visit me. Hong Kong is fun but I wish I had at least a day or two to see old friends. I miss you.

All the best!

Bye!

2005-12-19T23:20:00.000-05:00

Hey homefries: bye for three weeks! Try not to miss me too much.

I am off to the motherland!

At the mo, my living room is a jumble of suitcases, Christmas presents, clothes, and various Things My Dad Cannot Clean Up Because He Is Crippled and Cannot Use His Arms Because He Needs Them for His Crutches.

I have two suitcases; a big one, and a small one. The small one is full of gifts for relatives, and it's in the big one, where my week's worth of clothing is. The plan is to return with both of them filled. The boys on my floor want me to buy them cheap airsoft guns. I don't even know what those are.

Anyhoo, I'm not planning on sleeping tonight so I can be completely exhausted and pass out for as long as possible on the 20-hour flight (what the heck else am I supposed to do with my time?), so if you want to give me a ring-a-ding at home and perhaps catch up since I won't be here all break and not back in Toronto for any good stretch of time until the end of February, I encourage you to do so.

I might update if I get the chance, but if I were you I'd just wait for the massive truckload of pictures I'm going to be coming back with so you can live vicariously through me then.

Toodles! Have a very merry Christmas and an excellent new year.

Gee-to.

2005-12-18T10:10:00.000-05:00

Back to normal, with a lovely red Takamine guitar. It's been a while.

AND

Congrats to Chris and Amanda on their engagement! Weddings must be the most beautiful occasions ever.

Sideswept Bangs

2005-12-16T20:15:00.000-05:00

I got a haircut. This is what it looks like:

Yes, that is a urinal. Yes, I am in the girls' bathroom.

Muse

2005-12-16T12:56:00.000-05:00

Remember when I was feeling like crap?

In the recent weeks I've found myself being filled to the brim with a brilliance that I can only call "love". An outpouring of music and passion and beauty flooding into the part of me that had withered a little since coming to university. Not that I was or am unhappy--I am surrounded by friends and laughter, I am seeing the fruits of my labour, and I am thoroughly enjoying the University Experience--but every once in a while we all get caught up in this multiple choice, no-room-for-error-because-this-exam-is-worth-35%-of-my-mark, whirlwind life we live, and it makes me mourn the loss of some of the finer things in life.

I think what I'm trying to say is--I am back. I recently watched The Red Violin, and if you haven't seen it you must. It's a beautiful movie of music and love and passion and--this all sounds familiar now, doesn't it?

Have you ever seen Pulp Fiction? To be honest I tried watching it the other night, and my one constant thought was HELLO QUENTIN TARANTINO, DO YOU KNOW WHAT 'CONTINUITY' AND 'PLOT' ARE? DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT THEY GO TOGETHER? ARE YOU AWARE THAT UMA THURMAN HAS 'INTERESTING' FEET AND IT WAS PROBABLY NOT A GOOD IDEA TO SHOW A CLOSEUP OF THEM FOR A FULL 10 MINUTES ON SCREEN? I realize that last bit is from Kill Bill, but my point still stands.

Now that I've danced completely off topic--back to my real point. Do you remember that scene where Uma Thurman and John Travolta are talking about uncomfortable silences, and then she goes off to the bathroom to snort coke while Johnny thinks of something to talk about?

I've had some of the most comfortable silence I've ever had these past few weeks. A tangible stillness and contentment, brought on by the warmth of holding someone beautiful close to your heart, and feeling like time is suspending itself just for you.

I feel safe, I feel warm, when you're here and I do no wrong.
I am cured when I'm by your side, I'm alright, I'm alright. Coldplay - "Careful Where You Stand"

Careful where you stand, my love

2005-12-11T00:26:00.000-05:00

Well, well, has it been almost a week already?

My week consisted of the following ten things:

1. Being told I might not be able to go to HK because my dad tore his Achilles playing ball and needed surgery, so my mom was considering coming back early, and felt uneasy with the idea of me romping around metropolis all on my lonesome. I distinctly remember calling my dad "old" and "crippled", in that order.
2. Being told I was going to HK after all--I am going to see my grandma for the first time in six (?) years (!), and my mom for the first time in three months and we are going to go shopping. MAD shopping. Christmas in HK is cause for insane camera happiness, having your senses assaulted on all fronts with all the lights, food, and festivites, and general romping around with complete disregard for the bank account.
3. Living it up a few steps above PG-13 (during exam week!). Subsequent (but short-lived) self-loathing. I've come to accept the fact that I do indeed have vices. No I will not tell you what they are.
4. Studying for finals. One down, one more later today (it is Sunday), and three more after that.
5. Trying to nurse my potted plant back to health.
6. Listening to Coldplay on heavy repeat, and regretting not having their albums. More for The List of Things I'll Eventually Purchase But For Now Will Just Listen to For Free.
7. Throwing my shizzle absolutelyfreaking everywhere in my room because Amy's been gone since Wednesday.
8. Complaining about how cold and snowy it is here in London. Dear Slushy Winter, I loathe you. Be cold and clean or be not Winter at all.
9. Maximum nighttime chillage and conversations into the wee hours of the morning with perhaps the most intuitive, understanding person I've ever met.
10. Getting calls on my cell phone from my mom and aunt from HK and Houston, respectively. Realizing that next phone bill will be MASSIVE. Also, girltalk up the wazoo with superstar galpals Webnesh and floormate Joolie.

Stress? What stress?

Why my school is better than yours (pt. 2)

2005-12-02T17:29:00.000-05:00

Firstly: thank you to everyone who's been helping out in this Nano/Video debate. I really appreciate it.

Secondly: Why my school is better than yours (pt. 1), and updated (amazing) photos by other people.

It started snowing last night around midnight, and when we woke up today there was a good half a foot of snow on the ground. Throughout the day it alternated between whiteouts and a clear blue sky, and now there is a good almost-foot of snow. My only regret is not having my camera with me when it was bluer out. In the half hour or so that I was outside, the clouds changed so drastically. But there were some nice colours going that my camera simply does not do justice.

Serge, with whom I have hockey fights.

Lovely iron gates surrounding Med/Syd Hall

Snow-covered trees overhanging the Thames.

UC

Me trying to take above picture

Ivey

Middlesex College

Again

View of the Thames from the giant bay windows at North Campus Building

Thames from The Bridge

I hear there's next to no snow back in the T-dot. You don't know what you're missing out on. Lying down in a foot of snow is like lying down on a cloud. Walking to class and being splashed by a passing cab driving through a puddle of snowmelt...not so much. But yeah. Like a cloud.

Mortal Kombat

2005-12-01T15:26:00.000-05:00

Round one:

iPod Nano vs. Video iPod

Fight!

Ease my debating. And don't say "Neither, get an iRiver" because that wasn't one of my options.

(The biggest question is: which would have the better finishing move?)

Visuals: Passion Toronto

2005-11-28T23:51:00.000-05:00

I'm going to pretend that these pictures do the night justice, but really...no.

For more about Passion visit 268generation.

Ricoh Coliseum

The Passion crew crosses the border for the first time

Part of the opening clip

Charlie Hall leads off with some of David Crowder's band members

Charlie Hall on the screen

Speaker Louie Giglio (You can watch his other messages on the website. They're great)

Chris Tomlin

Lifting hands to praise

Chris Tomlin: new song! First time ever!

Our friendly neighbourhood Sun.

Something I can't remember the name of.

More amazing pictures of our universe.

More universe. Galaxies!

And at the very centre of the galaxy on the left...(evidence of God's sense of humour: "Over to the left...just a bit...a little more...yeah. There.")

Kooky David Crowder takes the stage after Louie's message and it's a party up in Ricoh Coliseum

More David

I strongly encourage those who're curious to go to an event like this--I'm absolutely certain your respective universities run things with bands and speakers (such as Through The Roof), if on a smaller but nonetheless professional scale. Don't dismiss it as something that's "just for Christians", because I know non-Christians who went in with questions, and came out with a few less questions, even if they did not decide to accept Christ that evening.

In our modern-day society, where the perspective on what Christianity is has been skewed by the accumulation of memories of the human wrongs the church has committed, and the misconception that it's nothing but a set of rules to live by, or that the Bible is just a collection of nice little stories about a mythical guy who maybe said some cool stuff now and again, that there is no absolute truth--there is an even greater need for individuals to seek for themselves what truth is, and to level what you believe to be truth with the other things you come across and choose not to believe with equal scrutiny.

Yes, the church has done terrible things in the name of God and Christ. Yes, there are some who follow a religion of rules and set prayers and laws set out in scripture. Yet there is a movement trying to change that--to bring it back to the Bible, a book that has withstood more scrutiny and criticism than any other piece of literature ever written, to bring it back to a focus not religion as an institution, but a personal relationship with a living God who suffered with us so that we might be reconciled with Him.

It seems to me so many people are looking for answers, especially those of us in university. In the past two years I have never seen so many people who just don't know what their purpose in life is. They live day by day, going through the motions--perhaps they even like it, yet at the end of the day they go to bed not knowing if what they just did had any meaning. Is this you?

I have never been a good speaker, never good at putting into words the things I feel in my heart, or even reiterating what I've learned from the speakers that I've heard. I attend things like Passion Toronto and sit in church usually wishing that this person or that person could be there with me. At the same time, I want you, the people who take the time to read this, my friends and my loves, to think for a moment. To consider the notion that there is a God that loves you and wants you to come back to Him, who wants for forgive you for any wrongs you've ever committed if only you'd admit it to Him, who wants to pour out comfort and hope and joy into your life, and that He's got a purpose for you if you'd only seek Him and listen to what He has to say.

Today, if you hear His voice, do not harden your hearts.--Hebrews 4:7

Never mind about that ski trip

2005-11-24T21:16:00.000-05:00

It's settled: I'm flying back to the motherland the morning after my last exam, and I'll be gone until two days before school starts again. Christmas in HK, I hear it's amazing. Can't wait. It'll be NOT unbearably hot, and maybe I'll even be able to romp around town with old family friends and superstar Gord without the parents. Yeeeeah!

---------

Rewind to Tuesday night: Passion Toronto.

What can I say? Five thousand university students from all over Canada coming together at the Ricoh Coliseum to stand out in the cold, to focus on God, to pray for our campuses and our friends. Six rows back and centre to sing my heart out with Charlie Hall, Chris Tomlin, and David Crowder, seeing thousands of other students lift their hands to praise God in one voice, with one heart. The best parts of the night was when there were no instruments, no accompaniment, hearing five thousand voices sing in unison; hearing the murmurs of everyone praying for the same cause in groups of three; seeing people in the audience recieve Christ for the first time, surrounded by friends. How uplifting, how powerful--I wish everyone could have been there.

Louie Giglio's message made us all realize how small we are: not even a speck on a picture of our own galaxy, much less in the universe. Yet this God, one who opens his mouth and brings forth an entire universe without flinching or feeling fatigue, would bend down and send an atoning sacrifice for our sins. We're so small, and God is so huge. What is there that He can't handle, that we can't go to Him for?

And from Helen, who said it so well...
my dear friends:
i wish only the best for you
my hope and my wish would be that you'd know God
as your "alter ego".
in the most intimate way...
sometimes my heart aches knowing that you dont care
about your spiritual health anymore.
if it hurts me.
how much more is it hurting God...

* for those whose life is going well...
i'm glad.
glad that God blessed you in having a life that is going superbly.
but remember.
God shouldn't be your back up friend.
yes...he'll be there for you when u need Him
but... are u satisfied with JUST that?

*for those whose life isnt going well...
im sorry.
but im grateful that God has allowed you to stumble
just a little
because when we stumble we have to look up
and cling onto His unfailing promises.
remember.
God's cushion of promises is right where you fall.
His outstreched hands are reaching for you
let him in.
he wants to help you.

i say all this because i care
but ultimately because you need to hear it.
not from a teacher
not from a preacher
not from someone who's "above" you.
but from someone who needs to hear this just as much.
i love you guys o-too-much to not say anything.

God loves you
yes...
YOU....
and dont you forget it.

Pictures later.

Champion's Cup

2005-11-21T11:43:00.000-05:00

Med/Syd Vixens went 4-0 into the playoffs, only to be knocked out by Saugeen in the semis at TD Waterhouse Stadium. Their QB developed a bionic man-arm in 24 hours and threw huge long bombs and the recievers were making insane flukey catches. We were down by 8 pts at the half, and D adjusted to Ms. Man-arm and did an amazing job of holding them off, but the O was getting stopped. With 3 plays left in the game we had possession and an 80-yard drive for a TD plus we needed a 2-pt conversion...and it didn't happen. We all cried afterwards. Saugeen ended up facing Essex in the final and winning the Cup.

Aussie Dave and some of the other coaches peed in the Champion's Cup before giving it up, which was really classy of them.

Brescia Bowl: Med/Syd vs. Brescia

We never got to play West-Deli (who was creaming everyone they played in the tournament), Perth, Alumni, or Elgin. West-Deli was 3-1 in the tournament, 2nd seeded in playoffs, and we thought we'd be facing them in the final.

Afterwards the coaches all had great speeches for us, and an "anti-clown" party afterwards. Our "manager" Aussie Dave had had this running thing going all weekend with people being "f-ing clowns", and was "wondering why there were so many f-ing clowns in this tournament" and deduced that it was because "clowns like parties", and "when Med/Syd goes shopping for parties, we don't shop for pointy party hats and streamers, we shop for blood!", and that he refused to let any "f-ing clowns get a party tonight". So we had an anti-clown party that involved cake, a lot of drunk girls, kegstands, a small house, and the like.

Tournament Schedule:
Game 1 vs. Saugeen 13-7
Game 2 vs. Essex 14-12
Game 3 vs. Huron 14-6
Game 4 vs. Brescia/Kings 19-0

Semifinal 1 vs. Saugeen 6-14

Most satisfying game was beating Huron, whose sophs had an ongoing rivalry with Med/Syd since April, in the most despicable of ways. They were chirping and trash-talking so much on the field, name-calling, playing rough--but we never stooped down to their level, and we beat them and shut that b.s. up.

Pre-game was always fun, getting painted up, pep talks, running warmups. Our two noseguards always had matching facepaint--one day it was a checkerboard, the next vertical stripes, and the last day they had skulls painted on like the Punisher logo. As the tournament went on we all had more fun with our facepaint--stripes, half-stars, bandits, claw marks--and we were the only team to do it.

Noseguards Suze and Megs getting their faces painted.

So that wraps up girls' flag football, and it was so worthwhile. Now onto intramural snow touch football and actually going to dragonboat practices. So many of the girls want to come back as sophs next year just to play for the Vixens and to win that Cup back. And yes, I am one of them.

White stuff

2005-11-18T13:45:00.000-05:00

It looks like Christmas in London! Just started snowing this morning, fat, fluffy flakes--and it's staying, almost a few centimetres now. The traybogganing down UC hill has already begun, as has the perilous-but-fun run-and-slide across the bridge. I'm going to start wearing snowpants to class--I'll drop 15 rungs down the ladder of social status, but I'll be warm, and everyone else will be dead from overexposure. And then I'll be cool. So take that.

All signs point to blasting Trans-Siberian Orchestra from my room.

Ski trip over the break, anyone? Please? Please? Please?

Mm, preventing synaptic transmission

2005-11-17T14:15:00.000-05:00

All I can say is, I have a newfound love for painkillers. Goes down easy and lets me get on with my day! What's not to like? So after writhing in my bed nauseous and in pain like an idiot for two and a half hours Joolie came to save me with drugs and tea. Yeah it was a party in my room while waiting for the drugs to kick in. And when I got up, walked around, and started eating her food again she knew I was feeling better.

Yes, I missed every single class I had today. I'd like to think I'm not falling behind, but I think I am.

Of friendship

2005-11-15T15:30:00.000-05:00

I don't usually dwell on things that are over and done with, especially things I invested effort into learning how NOT to think about it, but well, it happens, and I conclude probably for good reason. This is a reworking of something I wrote a few days ago that I realized rang true for me in a context outside of the original purpose for which I'd written it.

In the past there have been wrongs and rights, and in my thoughts and in my words, in what I have done and what I have failed to do, I share a burden of guilt, even if for me most of that yoke has been lifted off my shoulders as I am made free in my Lord Jesus Christ. Yet how many times can you count where I've been a hypocrite to everything I say I believe in and follow? The biggest thing preventing the furthering of the kingdom of Christ is Christians themselves. I don't want to be the cause of someone else's pain and I freely admit my wrongs and beg forgiveness--and let he who is blameless cast the first stone (John 8:7)at me.

The topic of growth has been in the corners of my mind as of late and the last few months have changed how I view and value my friendships and relationships. I really do believe everyone needs someone to confide in about their hopes and dreams--and more importantly, their fears. Our aspirations drive us, but fears are what must be overcome to achieve them. It is only since leaving my friends at home and elsewhere have I learned that no matter where they are and on what terms we left off that I genuinely love and support them regardless, and on that note: I'd like you to know that my arms are open should you choose to come into them. I hope the foundations that were laid the past few years do not crumble into superficiality, but build and change into something deeper, something involving fears and hopes and dreams, answering the unanswered and exploring uncertainties together. So let's interact.

Now growth is a very personal thing, but your interactions guide them, and as much we often run into awkward situations on our respective journeys to truth and self-discovery, I sincerely believe that awkwardness we sometimes have is an opportunity for people to grow in friendship, not a signal to run away from it. That inexplicable feeling of closeness to another person that sometimes brings about discomfort is our ally and not our enemy--we fight what we feel when confronted with old feelings that make us uncomfortable, good or bad, instead of embracing its potential and channeling it toward something deeper. Where there is a bond that won't be broken is what I'm moved to build on, from the bottom up, and I urge anyone who reads this to do likewise. I want to know what it is that scares you, your embarrassing baby stories, why you do the things you do and what you think of things that matter, and to be able to discuss these things as if you laid your heart out on the table, naked, awkward, and vulnerable and not disguised in shallow laughter and clever one-liners--because most of the things above that are really nothing at all, and for what I'd like to consider potential lifelong friendships to be based on nothing at all is not only illogical but deeply unsettling.

That is, not to say that friendship comes easily or without cost. I have been flustered, frustrated, angry, perhaps even spiteful when it comes to the people I claim to love unconditionally, but I know that, not as an excuse but as a simple fact, I am far from perfect, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23). Yet despite that fact I have learned to be unafraid to lay it all open, glistening and visceral so you can see who I am and not Tiffany the Well-Rehearsed Show.

After a particular discussion this weekend, I hated myself for breaking down again like I always do, a repeating pattern of tears and frustrated, incoherent babbling...yet I couldn't control my tongue or the passion I had for what I was trying to say, as if something were pushing the words out from inside my chest because they had to be heard, while at the same time my mind was screaming stop, it doesn't matter what you say anymore, you've done this, why are you doing it again? I was so tired of the same thing every time, tired of crying, tired of kicking at what felt like a dead horse, tired of what I might've said unthinkingly in the past tainting any hope of getting a message across without simply being tuned out, just tired. I cried out to God to just do something or make me stop what seemed a waste of effort, said the words I can't out loud and in my heart a thousand times. And He answered and suddenly everything made sense--it had all been worthwhile. Yet I couldn't have known the calm after the storm until, obviously, after the storm. Friendship isn't easy, but it's right.

And that is my prerogative, but it's a two-way street. Friendship is an "us" thing. "Our" journey, "our" exploration, and "we" only go as far down the path as we choose to take it. But in the words of Matthew: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks recieves; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened. (Matthew 7:7-8)

And as for what I think of the importance of friendship, I leave you with Ecclesiastes 4:9-12. There is so much waiting to be done.

Will you let me lift you up?

Vixens

2005-11-13T23:56:00.000-05:00

BRESCIA BOWL CHAMPIONS 2005-2006

We played a night game at TD Waterhouse stadium (where the Big Boys play) under lights and it was spectacular. Creamed Brescia with a final score of 30-something to zero, with our massive 10-lineup team running their 2-lineup team into the ground. Great cheering, good spectator turnout considering the was cold and windy, and it was tons much fun.

Pre-game was like something out of the movies; we stopped traffic at the bridge and ran across it as a team, the coaches gave us an amazing pep talk (..."this game is won by inches, and will be won by those who are willing to die for those inches") and we walked onto the field with a flagbearer out front waving our emblem and our colours, a mass of black jerseys and war paint. We lined it up on the field in ruler-straight lines, did shuffles as a team, hit the deck with "HUNH!" as a team, and when asked "WILL YOU EVER QUIT?" 70 voices yelled back with "NO! WE WANT SOME MO'! WE WANT SOME MO'!"

At Mustang games there's this lady who rides from one of the field on a horse every time they score a touchdown--at OUR game we had two guys dressed in a horse suit--not even a horse suit, it was more like a centaur--running up and down the side with our flag.

Brescia brought out their mascot...a pink bee, and a random guy in the stands wrestled it to the ground and its head fell off, only to discover that the person inside it was a girl so he had to stop--then she started beating him up. Yeeeah, 'twas funny, not gonna lie.

Pictures when I get 'em. The jerseys are sweet, I assure you. The coaches have zipups that say "Vixens" on them with a little fox curled up under it, and we've got the big version on the front. Our coaches looked so sleek with their dress shirts, ties, and zipups--some even wore full suits. Classy we are.

Next up, Champion's Cup this coming weekend. Everyone's out to beat us because we're the best!

Passion Toronto

2005-11-07T19:08:00.000-05:00

If you've heard about this already and are planning to go: see you there, homefries!

Who: Chris Tomlin, David Crowder*Band, Louie Giglio, Charlie Hall
What: Passion Toronto - uniting University students for His renown
Where: Ricoh Coliseum at Exhibition Place, Toronto
When: Tuesday, November 22nd, 2005. doors at 6:30, 7:30 start
Why: 'cause we be lovin' worshipping with thousands of other people with one voice, in one room, during one MASSIVE event
Cost: Free (that's motivation in itself)

Spread the word! Should be...how shall I put it? Freakin' awesome. (Or just soooooooo good, which was all we could say of the Passion '05 CD.)

Hope to see you there! 'Cause I'll be there, and I'd like to get all euphoric and sweaty in a crowd of people with you. Yeah, mind out of the gutter, gutterbrains. But THAT'S WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN, if last year's Hillsong United concert was any indication. Unless I break my leg getting on the bus, or come down with food poisoning (only those two things, nothing else will stop me), I will catch you muchachos at Passion T.O.

Blogiversary

2005-11-04T11:02:00.000-05:00

Let's pretend it's October 11.

I know it isn't, indulge me. I missed it and I don't want to wait until the 2.5 year mark.

For the past two years I've had no reason to maintain any corner of the inter-nets, much less something so personal, but for reasons like procrastinating on homework and deciding that people like you like to know what's going on/live vicariously through me I've kept it. To your credit I can't believe you guys actually read some if not all of the annals of my life that I posted since I was all but sixteen years of age, most of which seems fairly trivial to me now--not to say I considered my life two years ago trivial, I just seemed to write a lot about things that were Not So Significant. Also to your credit, I could always count on you guys to justifiably tear me apart and set me straight when I was being a blatantly obnoxious opinionated jerk. Now my views have been changed, or at least become more well-rounded; I know where the lines fall and how to go about stepping past them when conversing with others without slamming doors in my own face even before I've taken the first step.

And so it's evolved. From posting five times a day, to (sometimes) once every five days. From trivialities to (okay scratch that, I still post trivialities). But perhaps what I like most about having kept this up for two years is to see for myself how I've changed. Some things have stayed the same, but even reading my own writing--I know it's me, yet it isn't somehow. Maybe the best way I can put it is it's gone from something more for the amusement of both my sarcasm-loving teenage self and an audience of my peers to something I'd be okay with my 78-year-old grandmother reading. Not sanitized, per se, just the focus has shifted as the years have gone by, and for the better. I've grown into someone I'm okay with being, not that I've lost that lightning-fast biting wit or anything (hah). Perhaps this is a sign I've finally grown out of puberty and the Case of the Raging Hormones has finally stopped and I can get on with my life already.

So in short, dear readers: thanks for sticking by me. Some of my old posts make even me wince. What was I thinking? Despite all my effort to make this not just another run-of-the-mill Xanga/Livejournal/Blogspot/whathaveyou page where you throw in lots of random inside jokes for all your homefries and angsty sentences with "deep" meanings nobody gets, type in alternating caps, spell poorly, write large run-on sentences like this one, rant about people half your readership doesn't know; where nobody beyond the scope of the people who're in your closest inner circle really cares what you did all day because most of the time you really did nothing of any personal or greater significance, but instead something that actually has meaning beyond "so I made myself the most delicious tuna fish sandwich..." or "I like the colour pink", I'll admit it's slipped into that on more than one occasion.

Which brings us back to square one. I like this space as a place to chronicle my life and to write about the things that rock my world, especially now that most of us are so far apart and I think you like reading mine as much as I like reading yours. At the same time, I want it to have meaning beyond daily activities like body functions and eating breakfast--things that are fairly meaningless in the grand scheme of things. 'Cause really, impact matters to me even if this is a personal site, and there are perhaps only three things that get me all riled up and inspired: clever, well-written or well-delivered anything, a stunning photograph or artwork, and music.

So while I figure out how to go about incorporating impact,

Happy Blogiversary.

Why I think Western is better than whatever school you go to

2005-11-04T09:51:00.000-05:00

Because it's just so pretty. I only wish I'd gone out with the cam before half the leaves dropped off the firestorm that was the "forest" behind Ivey, and that it hadn't been so overcast when I did finally get out there with it.

View of the Thames river from the bridge.
Big trees outside Sydenham Hall.

Quad foliage.

UC covered in ivy.

Also, go here for photos by some other guy. Some of those winter ones...Oh be still my heart.

Fright Nig---zzzz...

2005-10-30T21:44:00.000-05:00

Hallowe'en: when the slutty girls see just how little fabric they can use to cover their parts, and when non-slutty girls become slutty just because they can. Hookers, firefighters, policewomen, schoolgirls in garters. Yay-uh. I did see a banana costume and a sack of potatoes. Haha, creative costumes rock my socks.

So, after 3 hours of sleep Commencement night I was a)up to catch the bus so I could b)write my midterm (it was tricksy). I wasn't planning to go to Hallowe'en Hullabaloo that night because a) I don't celebrate Hallowe'en, and b) I was really tired due to a) and b) previous.

The sophs had set up a haunted house in the Medway library, so it was pitch black and you walked through a glowstick-lit path with people jumping out at you. (I didn't go in. I don't like things jumping out at me). Twix my soph wasn't allowed to be one of the scary people in the haunted house because she was a giant green crayon.

So after like, two hours of doing hair and makeup for Brianne, Jill, and Julie, I threw something together for the sake of checking out the dance. I think I winced at my reflection for my lack of creativity and the obvious cliched-ness of what I'd thrown together.

But then, as we were walking through the tunnels to the Formal Lounge...

"Hey, are you Gogo from Kill Bill?"
"Uh...yes! YES I AM."

Should've got a bola.

ST-3 like what.

Cabbie the Ridiculously Tall Stick Man as an 80's tennis player. (Or that guy from The Royal Tenenbaums)

My favourite:
Jill and Julie as mobsters, in the girl's bathroom.
(Yes we have urinals.)

I came back early and fell asleep until some LOUD DRUNK ASIAN LIGHTWEIGHTS and A FREAKING VIOLIN BEING PLAYED AT MIDNIGHT woke me up. Thank you, daylight savings, I needed that extra hour of sleep. Didn't stop me from still being so tired in church today, and little Roman calling me "Tetya Tiffany" made me feel old. Vlad, his dad, who picks us up every Sunday forgot to turn his clock back so he was here an hour early, thought we weren't gonna show up, and went to church only to discover the parking lot empty, and came back to pick us up. Bahaha. But he did do a wicked job translating the service, even though he said his brain hurt afterwards. His wife Tatiana made us lunch afterwards while Serg, Vlad and I played with Roman, and we were thoroughly amused by their married-couple loving bickering.

Still so tired, and I'm getting sick.

A thousand words

2005-10-29T18:55:00.000-04:00

Commencement + going out afterwards + having to catch bus in the morning = writing bio exam on 3 hours of sleep. I definitely drifted off a couple of times.

Hooray for Commencement, it was great seeing everyone again and picking up like we never really left. I didn't even know half the people graduating, but oh well, that's what I get for being in a bubble. BP was good fun even if the pizza we ordered was kind of gross (shutup, I didn't know it would be covered in onions), and the stoner party that we went to for like, 45 minutes before we (I) couldn't take the time-wasting anymore would probably have been better spent sleeping. I don't want to just be hugely redundant since I'll be echoing the sentiments of everyone who got around to posting before me, so I'll summarize by saying I didn't realize how much I missed people until I was surrounded by them again. :)

Next time I'll be back is Christmas.

This pictures is here only because of Patrick.
Two people in a completely heterosexual relationship.

Proving once and for all that you can take 'em out of well, fob-land, but you can't take the fob out of them.

I'm disappointed that most of my pictures are blurry. Do you have non-blurry pictures? Will you ace them over, superstar? Please?

...That's your cue!

Skipping

2005-10-24T11:58:00.000-04:00

Does it count if I don't have to go?

------

From the second letter of the apostle Paul to the Corinthians

"I repeat: let no one take me for a fool. But if you do, then recieve me just as you would a fool, so that I may do a little boasting...You gladly put up with fools since you are so wise! In fact you even put up with anyone who enslaves you or exploits you or slaps you in the face. To my shame I admit we were too weak for that!"-- 2 Corinthians 11:16-21

"If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weaknesses."--
2 Corinthians 11:30

Well then.

Can't you see Paul in your head, all imprisoned and angry and lashing out at the Corinthians? Sweet. Context (especially historical) is everything, I've discovered, God has a sense of humour, and even the apostles weren't all sugar and fluffy bunnies. Like any book, it's that much better when brought to life. You can read it and think it's dry, but sometimes I read it and I'm thinking this is freaking sweet! Look at the rich guy, embarrassing himself and throwing away his dignity by running (rich Jewish men didn't run back then, apparently) down the street in his fancy robes to welcome his ingrate philandering son back! Why the heck would he do that? (Luke 15:11-31).

No, seriously. That's exactly what I was thinking. It's not as dramatic in black and white.

And that, my friends, is why I love historical context. So what if Jesus was talking to a Samaritan? What's a Samaritan anyway and why were they such a no-no to associate oneself with? What's wrong with pigs? Who wrote Genesis? What's a Sanhedrin? What was going on when Paul wrote all those letters to all those churches?

Pretty freaking sweet. Actually, while we're on the subject, if any of you get a chance to read Lee Strobel's The Case for Christ, do it. I have a copy that I haven't finished yet that people are free to borrow if they're interested.

Basically, it's a skeptical legal affairs journalist's personal investigation of the evidence for Jesus, covering:
-the historical reliability and accuracy of the Gospels (and the thousands of supporting texts) as it pertains to eyewitness accounts, corroborating evidence, scientific (archaeological) evidence
-analyzing Jesus as both a historical figure and the Jesus of faith, his possible psychological profile, and if he fulfilled all of his claims and the written prophecies
-the resurrection - medical evidence, the appearances to the twelve and to the crowd, circumstantial evidence
-a historically-based conclusion - what it means and how it applies today

In addition, the book includes lots of additional reading references.

There's also The Case for Faith, also by Lee Strobel...which I haven't had a chance to read yet.

------

Lab this afternoon, football practice. Last practice I gave one of my own teammates a bloody lip when we were running a crossover handoff, and then I took out the noseguard. The soreness in my shoulder from ramming into the other slotback is spreading down my arm as the bruise heals, I've got a nice purple spot on my knee, and my left jawline is swollen. I'm looking forward to the tournaments, and I hope it rains.

Half

2005-10-22T11:23:00.000-04:00

Thus ends my midterm double-header. Flew through Psych this morning, 66 questions in 45 minutes for a 2-hour exam. Calculus last night went very well. I know I made some stupid mistakes, but not enough of them to completely screw myself over, and given my past history of making stupid mistakes, I suppose I can't expect any less of history than for it to repeat itself. I don't call myself bad at math for nothing.

I am expecting "A"s in both. That's right. And by "A" I mean in the absolute-value sense of the mark. Screw you, curve. But in case you end up having the possibility of saving my neck later, curve, please don't hold that last comment against me.

Bio next Saturday, Chem the Saturday after.

The first time I typed this it wouldn't post and I forgot to copy it first. So I don't remember what I said. Something about labs.

Oh yeah. Thanksgiving has now thrown my lab schedule in such a way that I have a week of all labs, and a week of no labs. I don't know whether to be grateful or annoyed.

For the week
CAISA fashion show auditions
Physics test (my slide notes are covered in writing, and none of it is actual Physics--all of my prof's ridiculous quotes)
DB practices (assistant coach, what!)
Brescia Bowl practices (the Dirty Mexican play rocks my socks)
Commencement! (missing a Physics lab in the process)
Bio exam
Foot Patrol interview (mebbe)

Doing what any decent friend would do:

2005-10-21T11:41:00.000-04:00

Floorspace. (Forthcoming visitors, this is your heads-up.)

Jor-dan

AND...

Farmer Alex without perfectly coiffed hair! But, even after 8 hours of sleep he didn't have bed-head.

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Midterm tonight and tomorrow morning. I'm so pumped it's ridiculous.

Nobody ever achieved greatness without first believing they had something extraordinary within them.

Good luck, fellow midterm-ers!

Romance

2005-10-18T01:23:00.000-04:00

Sometimes, a girl just wants to run naked in the rain, lie spread-eagled on frost-laden grass and stare up at a black sky dotted with stars just so she can feel small, or let the sexy wailing of a trumpet playing dirty jazz wash over her while she stares out at a brilliant sunset, picking up traces of his day-old cologne wafting in the air and off her skin.

I want an assault on my senses, common or otherwise, I want to be so captivated by beauty I'm left speechless.

Since coming to university I think I've lost some of that. No photos in ages, my muse-ic has been shoved to the recesses of my soul--the creative juices are stagnating and it's making me all glum.

At least, it was on the weekend.

Ice cream, the trek in the rain to get The Passion of the Christ, and watching aforementioned movie made it better, a little.

Relatively short day of class, football in the rain, mud in my cleats and cold in my skin--

...you feel just to know you're alive.

I walked without shoes in the rain and didn't care.

I miss romance in its purest form, the captivation, seduction, and enthrallment brought on by living. It's waking up to see beams of light streaming in your room, coming home to milk and cookies on a lazy day, having the honour of seeing the last leaf fall off a tree, making snow angels with no coat on, watching the shadows outline his every feature as he studies at night, hearing silence roar, speaking without talking, running like you never want to stop, lying in the middle of the road in a thunderstorm...I could go on forever.

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I can do most of the old Calculus exam questions with zero help.

Snap back to reality

2005-10-15T14:54:00.000-04:00

Hee, Eminem. So Grade 10.

The boys are gone and it's back to studying.

The criminal Alex brought along turned out to be great. The showed up around 4:30 (after taking the city bus the wrong way...I said north!), dropped off their stuff, and got the "tour of Western". And by that I mean we walked from Syd to the UCC and back and I pointed out stuff that was visible on the way and implied that there were more buildings that they would never need to visit in the near vicinity.

Last night's Don Ross concert was awesome, about 150 people in a small room and some spectacular guitar playing. I only wish I knew anything about guitar so I could've been blown away even more. We arrived super-early (6:30 for an 8:00 show) and saved seats nice and close to the front. The organizer, Keith, completely forgot to ask us to pay for tickets, and when Alex and I went up to him after the show to pay he was impressed with our honesty and charged us $2 less per ticket. Jordan and Alex waited around afterwards for autographs and to shake Don Ross' hand, and then we proceeded to do the "walking tour of downtown London" (a.k.a. the boys didn't want to have to pay $2.50 for bus fare). Two birds, one stone.

Headed over to Demetre's for dessert, and passed by the long pre-midterm-season-partying lineups at all the bars and clubs. The three of us pummelled our pancreas...es with a sundae and a crepe covered in chocolate everything. Aaand then we took the "walking tour of residential London" to head back to Syd.

All high from the sugar, we practiced our sneaky moves and quietly crept about. The boys grabbed their guitars and we headed down to the lounge, where I dozed while they jammed for an hour and a half.

The next (this) morning I took pictures of them sleeping (until 11!), and if I were any sort of friend I'd have the decency to post them on the internet, or at least send them around, so perhaps I will when I'm feeling not so lazy.

Breakfast. Pool. Air hockey. Foosball. The Stewie Griffin Movie. Sendoff.

And now, back to Calcumulus. Freaking story of my life. I wish death upon Calculus.

Break

2005-10-14T10:22:00.000-04:00

As I was sitting in the half-dark doing derivatives of trig functions using chain rule and getting the right answers I felt this overwhelming sense of satisfaction at midnight on a Thursday evening. Of all the things that make me happy, I never thought Calc would be one of them.

Right this very second, I am skipping Physics (the class in which I gain very little from the lectures and probably wouldn't go to at all if it weren't for his hilarious little comments and participation marks (which we have managed to get around by handing off our clickers to friends who are going to class)). Speaking of Physics, the prof decided to give everyone who showed up to do the test a perfect score (regardless of how well you actually did) because his...wife...or something was saying how his diagrams (some of which were photos of people doing things) weren't clear. Considering how one of the photos was of a guy hurling a chicken out a car window to some lions, (and the question being: "Which of these objects is not in mechanical equilibrium") I guess that's understandable. Oooh and get this: tests are worth 10% of our final mark. In order to get a full 10%, you need to answer 67% of the questions right. We have a total of 42 test marks this year. You need 28 to get the full marks. With the first test, we're already at 13. And here I was sitting in yesterday's lecture listening to this precious German guy in a safari vest throw free marks at us: "You can't just show up to one more test, you'd have to come to at least two. Heeheehee!".

Midterms start next Friday, Calc and Psych, then one each weekend until November 5th. I'm done for the most part with Psych, and I'm chugging away here at Calc as much as I can so I can be free tonight and tomorrow to entertain Farmer Alex and whatever criminal he's bringing up with him. Woohoo! My first visitors!

I forgot to tell Amy they were coming until this morning. When she woke up. She has an econ midterm tomorrow.

"Amy, I have friends coming this weekend. Tonight."
"Where are they staying?"
"Uh, here."
"Oh. Okay."

I guess I didn't leave her with much room for disagreement, but we'll stay out of her way. :)

Flag football's getting better--our warmups are still crappy, but I've taken it upon myself to run for half an hour before practices. I'm playing offense, and we (hopefully) get our final positions and playbooks on Saturday. Slotback, please! "We call them sluts, but that's a term of endearment." Can't wait for the sweet, sweet Vixens jerseys.

And, back to Calcumulus.

House galore!

2005-10-10T01:17:00.000-04:00

So I got home today and there was a bag with the entire first season of House and the 3 season two episodes I've missed to date waiting for me on the shoe rack. I assume someone put it in my mailbox or something and my dad brought it in. I have my suspicions as to who it was, since the restriction on the domain of "people that Tiffany has complained to about not being able to watch House at Western" limits the range considerably (mmm, calcumulus). I promptly sent him a thank-you email stating that I'd return the DVDs the next time I'm home, but just in case it's actually some random creepy guy who happens to read this thing...thanks, Creepy Guy!

But really, If It Was You, some confirmation would be nice. That would get Creepy Guy off my back.

Yes, I've been having a good thankgiving and I hope you guys have been as well.

For Robyn

2005-10-08T20:56:00.000-04:00

Rules of the game: Post 5 Weird and Random facts about yourself, then at the end list the names of 5 people who are next in line to do this. Also leave a post on their blog to let these people know.

1. I used to be a kleptomaniac, but my conscience always got me afterwards.
2. I dream in colour and sometimes so vividly I don't know where I am when I wake up.
3. I'm only afraid of heights when it's entirely possible for me to fall and die. (e.g. not in a tall building)
4. I have an acute sense of smell.
5. I'm only neat if I have to be.

Next to do this: Steph, Sof, Neena, Eric, and J.

Turkey Weekend

2005-10-07T23:34:00.000-04:00

My physics test this morning was super easy and all multiple choice, done with the clickers and Scantron as a backup...and we did it in a lecture hall where it was more than entirely possible to just cheat (cheating is bad). Four hours of break in between to pack and clean my room (Amy left on Wednesday and again I threw my stuff everywhere), and then the Physics lab was blissfully easy and I finished superfast, which meant I could head back to Med/Syd just in time to pick up my ready-packed luggage, meet up with Hollywood and head out to the Greyhound terminal.

We arrived before 5:30, when the bus was scheduled to leave, only to find literally 100+ people waiting for the same bus already. What I want to know is why Greyhound didn't seem to think that everybody would be leaving the same day (it's Thanksgiving weekend!) and schedule more buses. While we were there we found Kevin from the floor below, and two of Kevin's friends. The staff at the terminal ended up sending out an "SOS" call to get more buses to come pick people up. To kill time we played movie games, Kevin and I duked it out American Gladiator-style on a metal platform, bought hot chocolate from Timmy's to stay warm, and I tried to teach them the "line game" (yes, the stupid one) and they didn't get it and told me it was stupid. In the end, we waited until 7:30 before we could get on a bus, and when we did it felt like Christmas morning. The ride was comfortable and went by quickly, with good conversation and that nice snug feeling that comes with being all cozy in a sweater with a cup of hot chocolate and a friend by your side.

People were so excited to go home it was contagious, even though Homecoming weekend was my first non-frosh week weekend at Western. Something about it just felt good.

Back at home-away-from-home, Turkey Drop Party at the Phoenix this weekend. That just seems so wrong for some reason.

Also, my accomplice-to-thievery got rewarded. At floor meetings everyone writes something that someone else did for them that week, and whoever gets their name picked get a bag of candy and The Duck until the next floor meeting. Stacey wrote about me taking her rollerblading and her thieving a pylon, and it got picked. I like The Duck, but I don't think I like having The Duck for facilitating theft. :P

So, I'm back! Holla at me, homefries.

Hehehe.

2005-10-04T12:57:00.001-04:00

Peta!

"Finally, Michelle Buswell and Caroline Trentini have given us empirical proof that - try as you might - supermodels just can't see you if you're ugly. So give up. Because even the supermodels' bodyguard, who can see you, is pretty unimpressed.

Either that, or Poorly Dressed Zealot is this season's must-have accessory. In which case, I think I want one in either red or Chinese."

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Mmmm, work.

The good (and bad) thing about being in university is that there's always more work you know you could be doing. I find myself doing work in every possible moment, sometimes because I'm being an early-in-the-year keener, sometimes because everyone else is working and I'm succumbing to peer pressure (or it means nobody wants to do nothing with me, take your pick), to the point where I'm ending up ahead of where I should be. All in all, a Good Thing, but I've been feeling like a shut-in for the past few days. It's only Tuesday and I've prepared for all my labs, done all my assignments and quizzes, and most of my notes for the week (and even some of the stuff for next week and the week after). Huzzah.

However, that means I have nothing really interesting to talk about, though when we went blading this morning Stacey did steal a traffic pylon, sneak it past a couple of city workers (while trying to go uphill) and take it back to her room. Fully lugged that thing for 20 minutes. I feel like such an accomplice to theft. I told her to leave it!

Not a shut-in

2005-10-01T11:55:00.000-04:00

Knights lost to the Attack 4-3 yesterday but it was a great game. Serge's friend plays on the Attack and got him a bunch of tickets, which meant the six of us were sitting in the Owen Sound "section" of the arena, and Amy my roomie who's from near Owen Sound was happy about that. It was both me and fresh-from-India AJ's first hockey games...haha. I kept my ticket stub.

Dessert at Demetre's after, and worth every penny.

Conversations in the dark on UC hill under the stars, throwing myself onto my back on the cold wet grass and feeling small and insignificant under the black sky speckled with constellations, being able to see my breath, an hour of standing by in lifeguard mode as Simon (Mr. Gung-ho Student Emergency Response Team Trainee) tried to coax one of my floormates out of a drunken stupor. There were so many drunk people around last night; I found myself so utterly turned off and somewhat disgusted. SERT was having a great time responding to calls I'm sure.

To top it all off, I got up this morning and finished my Caclulus assignment with flying colours. No really. I got the questions. I am satisfied.

Football game on TV this afternoon (because I don't want to pay $20, even if we do get Andy Fanteuse bobbleheads...I don't even know who Andy Fanteuse is) and then victory party tonight on Concrete Beach and UC Hill.

Of quotes

2005-09-30T15:02:00.000-04:00

I never thought I'd get to do this.

Physics prof: Wait, before I do this, I must explain. My Physics prof is a German guy with the sort of voice that's really easy to tune out. Thus, most people don't pay attention to what he's saying (and he doesn't say much, even though he talks for a steady 50 minutes), but when you're actually paying attention, you realize that hidden within his German accent and monotone voice there are gems of hilarity. And he doesn't laugh at his own jokes so you can't tell if you're not listening. We discovered this yesterday and now we sit in his class and crack up while the tuner-outers think we're psychotic.

On bioenergetics and predator/prey relationships: "You could go to the Serengeti and count all the lions and zebras or whatever. The problem with the Serengeti is that there are poachers and that messes things up a bit...but that doesn't matter."

On the T-rex and whether or not they walked upright and ran around as per Jurassic Park: "Did they run around? You don't see elephants running around like that."

Shown: T-rex standing on one leg. Also shown: the forces acting on the T-rex with other dinosaurs as the vectors (they're levitating and pointing in different directions. "Which dinosaur is the normal force?"

Calc prof: Two words: Can't. Teach.
"Excuse me, but what's wrong with this?" (the answer was right and I had marks taken off).
"You need to write it this way" *writes on board*
"I did, just in words. All you asked for was an explanation."
"Well, technically it's right. But you need more words."

Bio prof: One of three amazing ones, teaching the only class I'm really learning something in.
On the origins of life: *cracks egg into bowl* "Oh wait. I didn't think of what I was going to do with that afterwards. Never mind."

Next class: *makes mayonnaise by adding oil and vinegar to the egg in a blender* "There! The origins of life! Lipids and water in stable conditions."

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I have a hot date with Calculus this afternoon, and then I'm off to see my first hockey game ever. London Knights vs. Owen Sound Whatevers.

Calculus is stirring up painful memories. Of math. Nyaaaaaayayaya.

The other day, I thought I lost my keys, and then I found them in my closet after I walked aaaaall the way back to where I'd gone that night and back with no luck.

If there's anything I hate more than calculus, it would be when I can't do calculus.

And if there's anything I hate more than losing things, it would be when I realize I was just being an idiot and misplacing them.

As a final note, I think I'm going to start watching Clone High.

Gandhi: G-spot, rocks the G-spot!

Burn

2005-09-27T19:10:00.000-04:00

With German accent, "You are going to feel the forces because you are not going to be wanting to do that forever." --my "Physics for the Biological Sciences" prof, regarding the forces exerted on the patella when you bend your knee.

I like it when I wake up in the morning all sore. Living on the third floor in a res with no ~~stairs~~ elevator is also great for that, as is having every building on campus located uphill relative to your res. Yeah physical activity. DB practices start tomorrow, I might be helping run the dryland ones (!); flag football practices are fun, coaches are going around "scouting" and you'll all be happy to know that my name made it onto one of their "scouting" papers.

Homecoming is this weekend, and apparently we're going to get drunk and read ghost stories. And maybe leave our rooms too. Oh, and we're allowed one guest during Homecoming, so...let me know, kiddos.

About that thing where I was gonna forget academics and drown myself in clubs and extracurriculars...at this point, it looks like that might be entirely possible, and I didn't even join that many clubs.

Kenyaaaaa

2005-09-24T16:09:00.000-04:00

"Ian's teens" - Kyrios Fellowship (Ian and Sandra are almost hidden in the back)

Congrats to Ian and Sandra and their African-themed wedding and that amazing fake tree they had up on the altar. Loved it. The atmosphere was simple and light, and everything just felt right. The processional and recessional music was all African, as a reminder of the time they spent together in Kenya and how Ian proposed in a room he'd redecorated to look like the top a mountain they climed together (so he was standing there sweating in the middle of August in a winter jacket and toque when he proposed because he wanted to recreate that scene). Awww.

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I am home, and now I am bored out of my skull, but not literally, because at least that'd be mildly interesting. I am sitting here on my glutes talking to people in London because that's how little Toronto-home is offering me right now, and when I get on the bus to go home tomorrow I will be SITTING SOME MORE.

I'm never coming home again without The Best Reason/Motivation Evar. The two hour+ ride each way to find this sort of boredom waiting for me is not worth my time. Argh. If you die and you saved my life back in 'Nam or something, I'll come to your funeral, and that's a promise.